Between the Old and the New
by AddictedtoTsuzukiTatsumi
Summary: KikInuSan SessOCMirOn hold due to author's loss of interest in Inuyasha
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer—I sort of don't understand the purpose of these really, it's not as if any of us who aren't deluded think we own Inuyasha or it's characters....

But anyway, I don't own Inuyasha or it's characters. I only own the ones I create for this story.

This story will be told in both "flashback" (marked and separated) and "current time"

Amarra stood by Sesshomaru's side, her dark brown eyes glued to the dirt road underneath her feet.

"Feh." Inuyasha crossed his arms. "What's in it for us?"

"You have lost a party." Sesshomaru stated calmly.

Sango cautiously looked over at Inuyasha, catching as his ears fell slightly as he remembered Kagome. Or rather, how she left without saying goodbye...sealing the well between them.

"Point?" Inuyasha almost growled.

"Amarra here is an excellent warrior, for a human" Or rather, even in her pure human form, Sesshomaru added to himself.

"Then why are you giving her to us?"

"I have no use for her at the present time."

_Flashback_

_Amarra realized these were the last moments she was to spend alone with Sesshomaru. Her eyes opened, and she waited for the words she was dreading._

_But there was only silence._

_Amarra's eyes closed once more at the small nip Sesshomaru placed behind her ear. He reached up, wanting to touch her hair...but his hand dropped without allowing it._

_Cautiously she turned around to face him. Staring into his golden eyes, it was she that touched his hair, wrapping her fingers into the silky white strands. _

_And suddenly Sesshomaru just stood from the bed, saying those dreaded words. "Wash, and then go say your farewells to Rin."_

"_Yes, Lord Sesshomaru." Amarra answered quietly. _

_He hadn't changed his mind. She was hoping he would have changed his mind..._

_But he hadn't. _

_Flashback End_

Amarra bit her bottom lip, keeping her eyes from tearing.

"However, she was very beneficial to me at one time, so I want her to be with someone who will keep her safe. I may have use of her again one day."

Amarra finally looked at the group across from her and Miroku's eyes grew. She was so...lovely. Different than many of the other women here, he wondered if she was even from the same country. And the pearls she wore as a headband, made him wonder if Sesshomaru not only had brought them a human from another country, but also maybe even one with royalty in her blood.

Her skin was a bronzed tan, her eyes a deep brown, and she wore her long raven hair parted down the middle, in a braid on each side. Her outfit was similar to Sango's demon slayer outfit however...although it was a dark blue, and dipped down a bit in her chest area...allowing a little of her skin to come through.

"You trust us enough to leave her here to care for?" Miroku found himself asking.

Sesshomaru shot a glare at him, not bothering to answer the mere human's inquiry. "I will also leave you be while you have her" he added to Inuyasha.

"As if I have to be worried over the likes of you!"

"Inuyasha...." Miroku pulled him to the side, Sango following. "If she is a fighter, than we could use her help. And if your brother will leave you be, then that is more time we can focus on going after Naraku."

"You only want to bring her because it gives you another woman to molest." Inuyasha snapped.

Sango sighed. "Miroku is right. We need all of the help we can get."

Inuyasha looked back and forth between his friends. "All right. DID YOU HEAR THAT?!" he yelled at Sesshomaru without looking his way.

"Of course he did." Amarra answered silently. Miroku, Inuyasha, and Sango turned, and noticed the woman was standing by herself now. "That is why he and Jaken left."

"Lord Sesshomaru!" Jaken called. Sesshomaru paused, yet did not turn around to face him. "I still do not understand. Why leave her with..."

"Inuyasha's battling has improved. Besides, Amarra's and Inuyasha's scents are strong to me." Sesshomaru began walking once more.

So? Jaken wondered to himself...

Oh...he didn't just want Amarra safe, he wanted to be able to find her easily it seemed. Jaken shook his head. First Rin and now this other human. If he didn't see Sesshomaru make a killing just today merely because the person dared to trip in front of him and block his passing, Jaken may start to think that Sesshomaru had started going soft on humans.

"Well." Miroku offered her a smile. "Then let me formally introduce myself..."

"I wouldn't use your normal greeting if I were you." Inuyasha warned.

"Whatever do you mean?" Miroku pretended to be shocked, although his hand was already itching to stroke against Amarra's rear...even as his mind wondered, what their children may look like....

"Sesshomaru's scent mingles with hers, in a way that says she is one of his lovers." Inuyasha answered matter-of-factly.

And with that Inuyasha turned, walking down the road, Sango following, wondering aloud. "Sesshomaru has human lovers? As lowly as he thinks of us?"

"That is one of their few purposes according to him. As he said to my mother once, a male human makes only a decent servant, a female human only a decent whore." However, this human, Amarra, didn't smell like an ordinary human...but Inuyasha couldn't place his finger on it yet so he would keep that to himself for now.

Sango stopped in her tracks. "That is so vile...to just use her and toss her like she was nothing."

Inuyasha did not answer, continuing on ahead.

Sango followed again, silently this time. A "mere hanyou" or no, Inuyasha just proved again to her how much better he was to his Lord of a brother. She could never imagine him just using a woman and tossing her aside.

Sango found herself smiling.

Kirara jumped up on Miroku's shoulder, bringing him out of the shock caused by Inuyasha's words. "This is Kirara. And I am Miroku."

Amarra nodded respectively and then began to follow Sesshomaru's brother and... "Who is that woman that follows the hanyou?"

"Sango. And the hanyou is Inuyasha." Miroku found himself walking next to her, yet kept the sense of mind not to touch her.

And with that, the new group was off, headed for the village where Shippo was waiting.


	2. Understandings

Disclaimer—Only own the characters I created....not Inuyasha and the others on which this story is based...

"There you are!" Shippo sat up from his spot at the well....Kagome's well. "Where have you...who is she?" he glared at Amarra.

"She's joining us." Inuyasha answered, trying to keep his eyes from focusing on the well. The scent of her was even gone...and the emptiness threatened to break his heart further.

"What do you mean....what about Kagome!"

"Kagome isn't coming back!" Inuyasha yelled.

"That's only because you're being stubborn and not asking Kaede for help....but I asked..."

Sango watched, allowing Inuyasha to smack Shippo on his head. Then she walked over, picking up the small fox demon. "That's enough" she said to both of them. "Kagome does not wish to be here, and we are all respecting her wishes" she sat down with Shippo, watching as Inuyasha disappeared in a flash. "You are not being fair."

"Fair?! He drove Kagome away....don't you miss her?!"

Miroku joined them, answering for Sango. "We all miss her. But none of us miss her as much as Inuyasha. And everything that you say to him, he has already said to himself. However, sometimes, when you care for someone, you just have to let him or her go...sometimes you just have to go yourself. Kagome had every right to leave when she determined it was best for her...and Inuyasha has every right to not go after her if he knows that he cannot give her what she wants."

Inuyasha continued running through the woods, doing his best to empty his mind of Kagome...

Of the reason she left...

Of Kikyo....

He did love her...the problem was he still loved the other.

He had been honest as possible.

And, his heart couldn't choose, no matter how much he willed it.

No wonder Kagome had finally just had enough...

But it still didn't stop him from feeling bitter that she hadn't even bothered to say goodbye.

Amarra watched as Miroku looked at Sango while he spoke to the bratty fox. She couldn't hear what they were saying, she didn't care enough to move closer to find out...but whatever words were spoken seemed to be directed, or at least about Sango more than for the benefit of the little one.

"You can care for someone and know that you will never be able to give her what she needs." Just like he cared for Sango, but knew that he would never be able to provide her with the life she desired. There was a man waiting for her that would love her and only her...who would never wander...and the fact was, despite his feelings for Sango...the men in his family had never, ever been able to stay faithful to just one woman.

Miroku heard that his mother used to spend a lot of time crying because of his father...and he cared for Sango way too much to wish on her a life of tears, either because he couldn't remain faithful...

Or because he was swallowed by his wind tunnel and left her behind.

Sango looked as Miroku stood suddenly, and walked away. Meanwhile, Shippo watched as Amarra moved closer,

"Excuse me, but shouldn't we be finding some place to stay before night falls?"

Shippo crossed his arms, turning away from Amarra. "When Inuyasha returns we will leave." Sango answered. "As for Shippo..." she turned him around to face them once more, "He is just really missing our friend."

"We all have those that are missed." Amarra shrugged her shoulders. She looked at Shippo. "Nothing we can do about that, but it does not mean we should be rude to those that are here, isn't that correct Shippo?"

"Correct." Shippo gasped as the word came out of his mouth. Something about her take-charge tone....

"Do you have children?" Sango found herself asking.

"In a certain way." Amarra answered, leaving Shippo and Sango alone at the well.

Kirara carried Miroku, Shippo and Amarra as in front of them Sango tightened her grip around Inuyasha.

She had to admit to herself, it was exhilarating to travel like this, Inuyasha's hair brushing against her face as he sped down the road.

He glanced back at her as her arms gripped around him. "Are you all right?"

"That is rather a concerned tone coming from you." Sango smiled.

"If you fall, I will never hear the end of it from that brat." Inuyasha mumbled. He stopped running as he saw a village ahead. Sango slipped off his back and they began to walk.

"I think that Miroku and I explained things adequately to Shippo this time." Sango looked over at Inuyasha.

"I hope so. It will be good not to have him whining at me." They continued on in silence until Inuyasha found himself glancing at Sango this time. "What did you say?"

"We just explained to him that what happened was no one's fault...and it wasn't fair to blame one person over another."

"So you lied." Inuyasha walked a little quicker.

"How did we lie?" Quick enough that Sango had to jog to keep up.

"Kagome's leaving is very well my fault..."

"No it's not." Sango shook her head.

"And how do you figure that?" Once more Inuyasha slowed down, his curiosity peaked by Sango's answer.

"We cannot help certain feelings...we can only help what we do with them." Sango changed the subject somewhat, realizing that Inuyasha would never sit through a conversation with her about Kagome, himself, and Kikyo. "For instance...I might care for someone, but realize that our being together is not possible, at least right now. So, right now, I am choosing to close myself off from him emotionally..."

"Like Kagome physically closed herself off from me." Inuyasha finished the words that Sango wouldn't.

"Yes." Sango realized that Miroku was not the type to settle down with.

By the same token, she had much more to lose than her heart. There was no way she would just walk away from everyone until they had destroyed Naraku. So, Sango chose to only allow Miroku in so far...and it was getting easier now that he seemed to be trying to place some distance between them as well.

Besides, with Kagome gone, Sango knew she needed to take over the responsibility of taking care of Shippo...and, though she wouldn't admit it...Inuyasha as well.

Kagome's leaving had obviously left Inuyasha devastated. Sango could tell by the way he hardly spoke to anyone anymore. He had become so open in certain ways...but the day he realized Kagome was gone and never coming back, he started building this wall around himself.

And that would never do....

Inuyasha and Sango stopped, and in a moment Miroku took the lead in their trail.

He would convince the villagers to let them stay the night.

"Why are you looking at me?" Inuyasha arched his brow, looking at Sango. And only then did she realize she had been staring at him.

"I'm not." Sango lied and began walking once more, Inuyasha behind her.


	3. Closer and Farther Apart

Disclaimer—Only own the characters I created....not Inuyasha and the others on which this story is based...

R&R please

From his sleeping spot in front of the door where Sango and Amarra were resting Inuyasha's ears twitched and he opened his eyes just as Amarra left the hut. Before he could ask her where she was going she inquired, "Where is Miroku?"

"Why?"

"Because I cannot sleep knowing you are out here, and the demon slayer in there, listening to my every breath. It's most aggravating."

"Hm. I wonder if you could beat Sesshomaru in the obnoxious award. I was not listening for you, I just happened to hear you. And I doubt if Sango cares what you do."

"Of course she does. She doesn't trust me, she doesn't know me. Neither do you. That's fine...except for I cannot rest knowing I'm being evaluated, and if I don't rest then I won't be very beneficial in battle. So, all of that to ask once more, where is Miroku?"

"You think he trusts you more than us?"

"Probably not. However at least he's making an effort to be nice."

"Not as nice as normal."

"Meaning?"

Inuyasha turned away from her with his standard "Feh." He closed his eyes. She might find out for herself how perverted the monk was. Might...given Inuyasha had already warned Miroku as to why he needed to keep his hands to himself.

Whether Miroku listened or not was not of his concern.

Amarra realized Inuyasha was done "speaking" and set off to find Miroku's hut on her own.

A second later, Inuyasha spoke again. "She's gone" he said into the seemingly empty night.

Sango peaked her head out and then left the hut herself. "I should have known that you realized I was here." She sat down next to Inuyasha and only then did he open his eyes. "Do you think it is a good idea..."

"I think nothing." Inuyasha interrupted Sango. "Except for that I don't care. I warned Miroku, and the girl isn't worthy of a warning...let whatever happens, happen. Humans...will do what they want to do." He closed his eyes once more.

"Humans?"

"That's what they are, aren't they?"

"You say that word with such...disdain, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha didn't answer, but he also didn't move away from her, and Sango ventured speaking again.

"Just because Kagome hurt you does not make her a bad being....human or otherwise. Besides all beings deserved to be judged on their merits. For example, I was trained to hate your kind, but now that I know you, there is no way I could feel nothing but...admiration" Sango found herself blushing, and wondered why. "I would like to think that myself, Miroku, Kagome, and Kikyo at least at one time, have shown you that not all humans are bad. That Shippo has shown you that not all demons look down upon hanyous." Sango watched as Inuyasha stood. "Where are you going?" she asked, exasperated.

"To make sure that damn monk doesn't do anything to bring Sesshomaru here. I don't want to have to waste my time fighting him because the pervert doesn't know when to keep his hands to himself."

Sango watched as Inuyasha walked away from her.

Giving her the answer to her question in the only way he knew how.

Obviously all of them remained important to Inuyasha, even if he said otherwise.

Yes, Inuyasha was definitely one to be admired.

Despite all of his hardships, he managed to persevere to come out stronger than before. Even if he grumbled all the way.

He grew up in a world that shunned him, was living in a world that still did so, yet Sango had never seen him turn his back on someone who needed his help. Perhaps it was Kikyo who awakened that trait in him....perhaps it was Kagome who fostered it within him....but it was a attribute that was pure Inuyasha, of that Sango was sure. And she would be damned before she allowed Inuyasha to bury it within himself again because his life had reached, as what Kagome might term, a rough patch.

Sango realized she couldn't allow that not just for Inuyasha, but for herself.

It was one of, if she let herself admit it, many things about him that she liked

Like she liked the way his hair looked in the moonlight

Or the emotion held inside his lovely golden eyes

Or the passion with which he fought or argued

Or the matter-of-fact way in which he would help someone, so that he or she never felt indebted...

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Miroku turned around...but even in his sleep he realized he was being watched, and his eyes shot open. "Wha...Amarra? Is something wrong?"

"With Sango? No."

"What makes you think I meant with Sango?"

"I saw the way you looked at her today...you can go and check if you want. I left her sleeping soundly though. And the hanyou is keeping guard outside."

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Inuyasha sat down outside, unnoticed.

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"His name is Inuyasha."

Hanyou was the polite term Sesshomaru used for his brother. Therefore, it was good enough for her. So Amarra chose to change the subject and yawned, sitting down against the wall. "I am going to sleep here."

"Well, normally I would be flattered but...."

"Now you are saying odd things." First the hanyou and now the monk. "Why would you be flattered normally? And if you are flattered normally, then why not now?" Amarra reached up and began undoing one of the braids in her hair, not noticing as Miroku's gaze intensified.

"You are Sesshomaru's lover..."

"One of." Amarra began working on the other braid. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Then, do you think it's wise to be in here with me?"

Her hair down now, she shook it out before running her fingers through it. "I am here because I feel most comfortable with you of everyone. And I am sleepy and wish to rest. It is no more than that for me. I am sure that Lord Sesshomaru could care less where I sleep. And if he did, he wouldn't mind me sleeping here judging by how you look at the other woman..."

"There is nothing going on between Sango and myself. I have nothing but the utmost respect for her....what?" Miroku asked as the woman...smiled? "That is the first time your face has shown any emotion" he realized.

"So you are only lovers of those you have no respect for?" she teased. "I hope I never garner such respect."

Miroku chuckled. "You are amusing."

"And you are a tease. As handsome as you are, poor Sango is probably waiting anxiously for you to seduce her, yet you have the gall to respect her too much?"

"Sango has and will have more worthy suitors." Miroku laid down

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Inuyasha deemed everything safe and left his spot

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Amarra watched as Miroku closed his eyes. "Why would you think so low of yourself?" she asked quietly.

And without opening his eyes, he answered "Why would you think your lover doesn't care if you lay your head where another man is?"

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Sesshomaru watched as Rin slept. Though Amarra had said goodbye to her, when Sesshomaru came back without her, Rin spent the next few minutes asking where Amarra was. Until Sesshomaru finally quieted her with a stern "Enough!" and sent her to bed.

Yet, he had stayed with Rin, telling himself that he just wanted his presence to quiet the nerves of the little girl.

However, Rin had fallen asleep awhile ago, and Sesshomaru still had not left. Amarra's room was between his and Rin's. And Sesshomaru was not yet ready to pass it, knowing she was not inside.

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"Because it is a fact." Amarra stretched out and closed her eyes now.

Miroku looked at her, wondering if she truly believed that falsity. Sesshomaru had said he wanted her safe. That was probably more care than he had ever shown any of his lovers. Miroku could understand why as beautiful as she was...his hand was really itching to touch her ...

But that was out of the question, so he decided to end the discussion with a tease.

"Thank you for your earlier compliment"

Amarra opened her eyes with a groan, "It is impossible to sleep anywhere I see..."

"Unless you call everyone handsome?" he smiled.

"Just the ones that deserve it" her eyes shut. "Tease."

"Amusing."

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Seeing Inuyasha heading back, Sango shook her head of her thoughts. She stood and went back into the hut to sleep. She laid down, and closed her eyes as Shippo nuzzled closer to her in his rest. Sango opened her eyes once more, petting the top of Shippos' head absentmindedly...

Wondering if Inuyasha's hair was as soft...

"What are you doing?" she chastised herself.

Miroku had once teased that he did not know why Kagome and Kikyo were so "infatuated with Inuyasha".

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Kikyo ventured as close as her soul collectors would allow her. She did not want Inuyasha to know she was here.

Watching him.

As she did more often than she cared to admit.

There were times when she wanted him to know that she was there. Or rather, when she couldn't stop herself from letting him know.

Even if she lied and told him she just "came upon him". She never just "came upon" Inuyasha.

She always sought him out. Even though it tore her heart out watching him grow closer and closer to that Kagome.

That Kagome who was able to be close to Inuyasha in a way she couldn't...yet wasted most of that time fighting with him over things that were never important.

Kikyo mattered to Inuyasha, and she knew that. But she also was sure that Inuyasha would never be hers...sure that he could never be hers...and that caused her to say and do things that she hoped would stop Inuyasha's kindness towards her.

She did not want Inuyasha's pity...or his kindness...

She wanted Inuyasha's love.

Yet, the only time her body felt warm...the only time she felt truly alive...was when Inuyasha was with her.

So, sometimes, she just found herself calling for him...leading him to her...showing herself to him.

Allowing herself to bask in his presence, even as she knew that the cold emptiness would be back the moment he was gone.

And after awhile of licking the wounds of her broken heart, Kikyo would find herself watching Inuyasha as he slept...as he was now.

Until after a certain number of nights of just watching him, that pull to have him know she was there became to great and one day she would answer the urge.

So the pattern would repeat over and over.

It was a pattern Kikyo thought she needed to break.

Yet, then she would truly have to be without Inuyasha.

And that was a hell she was not ready for.

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At the time, Sango had laughed and agreed that Kikyo's and Kagome's interest in Inuyasha was an oddity.

Yet, even then, Sango realized that Inuyasha definitely held a certain appeal....

Of course, she reminded herself, if an attraction to Miroku was unacceptable, such to Inuyasha was doubly so.

And with that Sango finally closed her eyes for the last time, sleep claiming her almost instantly.

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With a sigh, Kikyo watched as Inuyasha's ears twitched.

And she left...

Just as Inuyasha opened his eyes...sure once more that he was dreaming...that Kikyo couldn't have been there.

He stood, and went into the hut with Sango and Shippo.

Watching Sango as she slept.

For some reason, watching Sango made Inuyasha miss Kikyo and Kagome a bit less right now.


	4. Morning Thoughts

(A/N-Rating may go back up. R&R please.)

As normal, Inuyasha was the first to awake. Though he was in a rush to get moving, he decided to let his traveling companions rest for a bit longer. He realized it was still rather early. It wasn't their fault that he never needed much sleep.

In fact, in his entire life, Inuyasha only knew of two people who sometimes beat him in awakening—Sesshomaru and Kikyo.

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Flashback 

_Inuyasha, still a "pup" of around 2 in human years, left the hut he shared with his mother. No one else in the village was awake, including his mother, so Inuyasha saw this as the perfect time to go investigating, without fear of being "in the way" of others, as they often pointed out for a reason he was yet to understand._

_Outside, one of the children had left a small red ball unclaimed, so Inuyasha ran up to it happily, picking it up and tossing it in the air, being careful when he caught it. His nails were so long...he was always very careful when handling things that didn't belong to him._

_It was just one of the things that made him different than the rest of the villagers. Made them hate him._

_Though he wondered why, he never asked...at least he hadn't yet._

_Bored with simply throwing the ball in the air and catching, Inuyasha tossed the ball down the road this time, and then ran after it so fast, that he was actually in front of it, and caught it before it reached the ground. His ears flopped with pride, and then he turned around, about ready to repeat the process._

_But as he faced the new direction, he found a pair of legs in his view. He dropped the ball quickly, hoping that he didn't get yelled at, or teased...or even hit, like he usually was by one of the villagers. But when he looked up and saw the face attached to the being in front of him, his fear disappeared. His ears twitched with glee as he smiled at the young "teen" who reminded him of himself._

_Inuyasha did not yet know who he was, but he was usually there in the mornings while everyone else slept. And Inuyasha liked him. _

_Sesshomaru looked down at his younger brother. "Your speed has improved."_

_Inuyasha nodded proudly. Sesshomaru bent down and picked up the ball, ignoring his brother's stare as he added, "But you still could not tell I was here."_

_Inuyasha bent his head, ashamed. "I'm sorry."_

"_Your apologies mean nothing to me."_

_Inuyasha felt his eyes tear, so he kept looking at the ground._

_Sesshomaru did not really want to be here. But he knew that he was the only one who could adequately train Inuyasha...and, for some reason, Sesshomaru wanted his little brother to grow up to be strong, a good fighter._

_Sesshomaru told himself that it was so when they one day had thief final battle and he killed Inuyasha as he had planning since Inuyasha's birth, that Inuyasha would at least be a semi-formidable foe._

_But sometimes...._

_Inuyasha smiled as Sesshomaru patted the top of his head. _

_Sesshomaru wondered if he was lying to himself..._

"_Ready?"_

_Inuyasha looked at Sesshomaru once more. "Yes."_

_Sesshomaru threw the ball, watching as Inuyasha chased it down. He caught it just before it hit the ground, and looked over at Sesshomaru._

_Sesshomaru made one nod in approval and Inuyasha smiled._

_Flashback End_

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Inuyasha sighed quietly...he hated it when he would remember things like that about Sesshomaru.

It made the fact that they hated each other so much now bother Inuyasha.

It was easier to just hate Sesshomaru...Inuyasha didn't want to have to be bothered by the fact.

Sango turned, but, to Inuyasha's happiness, she did not wake.

Inuyasha stood, leaving Sango's hut to go outside. He did not want her to know that he had slept in there where she was.

Really, he did not care so much if Sango knew. He just did not want to know that she knew.

He did not like it when people realized that their existence mattered to him.

Once they knew that their existence mattered, they started to expect more from him. More that he had felt unable to give since Kikyo.

Inuyasha understood that was part of why Kagome left. He could not give her what she wanted.

And he wished that she had never known that he had started to care about her beyond her ability to detect jewel shards. Then she wouldn't have expected more from him, and she would still be here.

So, Inuyasha was determined not to repeat that mistake with his remaining comrades. Let them all think they were only needed to help him destroy Naraku.

Everything was safer that way.

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_Flashback_

_Inuyasha's nose twitched, waking him from his sleep. "What?!" he called loudly._

_In a few moments, Kikyo appeared. "Good morning, Inuyasha."_

_Inuyasha jumped down from the tree branch. "There won't be a good morning until I take that jewel from you" he smirked._

"_Oh...of course." Kikyo smiled....she actually had the nerve to smile at him?!_

"_What's so damn funny?!"_

"_Nothing, Inuyasha." Kikyo's grin grew and she moved closer to him. "It's just that when you sleep, you look so beautiful that no one would be able to tell what a scoundrel you are."_

"_Feh." Inuyasha crossed his arms. _

_Kikyo watched him when he slept?_

_Why?_

_And even more important, why did that piece of information make his heart...warm?_

"_Have a nice day, Inuyasha." Kikyo turned and headed back towards her village._

_Inuyasha watched as she left...and he found himself realizing, that when he finally made his move for the jewel, and Kikyo put up a fight as he knew he would..._

_He would not be able to hurt her._

_When the hell did that happen?_

_Flashback End_

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Damn her...damn Kagome...damn everyone to hell.

Once feelings, even just of friendship, got in the way, everything became way too messy.

"GET UP!" Inuyasha barked loud enough for everyone to hear.


	5. Decisions

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

(A/N-Rating may go back up. R&R please.)

"Why?"

Jaken bit his tongue as Rin asked what seemed to be her new favorite question for what seemed to be the millionth time.

Sesshomaru made a mental note to allow Jaken one moment of eruption at Rin if this continued. He understood that humans and their constant inquisitive natures were quite annoying.

They needed a why and a reason for everything. That in and of itself did not bother Sesshomaru. It was their constant...asking...that he found so bothersome. When he wanted to know something, he just found out on his own. He had always been that way. He only found himself asking questions when absolutely necessary...as a last resort.

But not humans...

Not hanyous...

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Flashback 

_Sesshomaru tossed the ball one last time, and as Inuyasha ran to catch it, Sesshomaru turned and began to stroll away from the village._

_Inuyasha caught the ball and turned around, finding himself staring at the other's back. But for some reason, today, Inuyasha did not want to end their playtime so early. So gathering all of his speed he ran after, yelling out "Stop!"_

_By the third 'stop', Sesshomaru's nerves were had. "What" he answered so low it was almost a growl._

"_Please play some more." _

_Sesshomaru turned, looking at his brother. "I'm done with your for the day."_

"_But..."_

"_What?"_

_Inuyasha opened his mouth, but nothing would come out. So Sesshomaru turned and began walking again._

_Inuyasha's mind raced...he wanted the other to stay...he needed for him to stay...so...."Who are you?" Inuyasha finally got the nerve to ask._

_The question stopped Sesshomaru and he turned, looking at Inuyasha. "Sesshomaru."_

_Inuyasha blinked his eyes, trying to form the name in his mind. "Sesshomaru?" he finally repeated._

"_Yes."_

_Inuyasha smiled; proud he had gotten such a difficult name correct on the very first try. Thus, he figured this Sesshomaru owed him another answer. "Where do you come from?"_

_Sesshomaru pointed, "Far that way."_

"_Can we play there?"_

"_No."_

"_Why?"_

"_I do not want to play with you there. In fact, I do not wish to be playing with you at all."_

_Inuyasha knew enough to be hurt; yet not offended by Sesshomaru's statement. "Why?" Inuyasha's voice lowered, but he managed to keep the tears from stinging his eyes._

"_Why what? Why do I play with you, or why do I not wish to?"_

_Inuyasha tilted his head, wondering which question he wanted answered. He decided on another one entirely."Why do you look like me?"_

_Sesshomaru cut his eyes, sending Inuyasha jumping back a small step. "The correct statement would be that you look like me...not the other way around."_

_Inuyasha nodded. "Why do I look like you" he corrected himself._

"_That is how heredity works."_

_Inuyasha was completely confused now. What in the world did that mean? "Huh?"_

"_I have answered your question. When you are older you will understand what I mean."_

_For some reason that satisfied Inuyasha and he began another one. "Why are..."_

_Sesshomaru sighed deeply. He had more important matters to attend to. So with an "I have had enough of you." Sesshomaru turned and began walking again._

_Inuyasha's ears dropped and he watched as Sesshomaru moved further away from him. _

_He had pushed too far...now he would never see Sesshomaru..._

"_Tomorrow." Sesshomaru called, just loud enough for Inuyasha to hear._

_Sesshomaru heard his brother giggle with glee and then Inuyasha ran back towards the village. _

_Flashback End_

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"Rin, no more questions." Sesshomaru ordered, eliciting a sigh of relief from Jaken.

"One more?" Rin plead.

"One."

"Can I go outside?"

"Yes."

Jaken felt his tiny body tense once more. Now he would be forced to spend the day trying to keep up with the little girl.

Sesshomaru watched as Rin ran down the hallway, Jaken following her, begging her to "wait" over and over.

There was a time when Rin was allowed to go outside whenever she pleased, as long as she stayed on the main grounds.

That was before the intrusion

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Flashback 

_Damned hanyou. _

_He couldn't believe that change in Inuyasha had actually made him, Sesshomaru, fearful for even a second._

_It was just another in a long line of frustration Sesshomaru had felt...during those rare times he allowed himself to get frustrated._

_His father left him with that useless Tenseiga, while giving the damn brother of his the glorious Tetseigua _

_But at least now Sesshomaru had the Tokijin. The Tokijin was made from the fang of the demon that broke the Tetseigua._

_Yet, in breaking it, it seemed that Inuyasha had found another form of strength. It seemed that Inuyasha could in fact turn himself into a full-blooded demon._

_And that full blooded-demon version of Inuyasha actually had the nerve to cause Sesshomaru just the slightest fear?_

_Even relieving his frustration by sleeping with Amarra had failed to do just that...Sesshomaru was still frustrated as all hell. _

"_Damned hanyou" he said to himself._

_Hanyou...half-breed? Amarra remembered. _

_  
Whatever. _

_Amarra sighed inwardly, anxious to get back home. If it hadn't been for the fact that this damned demon had once saved her village, _

_For a price of course_

_His pick of his choice in jewels and one woman._

_Lucky her, she was chosen....Amarra fought the urge to roll her eyes at the sarcastic thought..._

_To their credit, the villagers begged Sesshomaru to make another choice. Amarra was one of their best fighters...she was the only woman to fight with the men of her village against their attackers before Sesshomaru decided to step in and end the battle once and for all._

_Little did Amarra or anyone else know, the reason he chose Amarra was because she was a warrior._

_He had watched her battle and was impressed...as impressed as he could be by a human that is_

_He decided he wanted to know if there was any difference between the women he normally chose, the 'ladies' of the village, or a warrior. That was the reason he offered to end this battle for them._

_Particularly so he could choose to take Amarra with him when he felt like it._

_Meanwhile, Amarra would have rather he killed her than spend any time with this damned demon._

_But, she did not want anyone else in her village to fall to such a fate. So she went "willingly" whenever Sesshomaru called for her. And she begrudgingly had to admit that it was not as awful as some might imagine. He was attractive...and there was a way about him...and while she knew she did not have the privilege of being able to say "no", Sesshomaru never physically forced anything. _

_And it got to the point where she would actually enjoy...being...with him._

_While afterwards, she just wanted to run back home and hope he never called her again._

_She usually stayed for a day or two before he took her back._

_But judging by his demeanor...or the fact that he even had a demeanor...Amarra figured it could be awhile before she was allowed to go anywhere._

_Suddenly, Sesshomaru looked upwards as if..._

_He bolted out of the room, leaving the door open in his rush._

_Such a rush, that Amarra was curious to know where he was going._

_If she was lucky, he was rushing off to his death and she could get the hell out of here and never return._

_Sesshomaru landed in front of the gate to his castle before the intruder had the chance to get it open. The stench of this large, hairy demon would have made some queasy. _

_And what was that muffled sound?_

"_You have one moment to convince me not to kill you for daring to be here, demon." he stated calmly as he readied his claws, not bothered by the surrounding like intruders edging closer and closer to the gate._

_He could use a nice demon slaughter._

"_Listen" the demon replied._

_Sesshomaru reached up...but that sound...that was a scream..._

_Rin._

"_The girl is hidden."_

_Girl? Amarra wondered to herself as she watched from the inside of the gate, her form hidden behind Sesshomaru's from the other side. _

"_Even your ears aren't tuned enough to know where, dog. So if you attack, you run the risk of killing her."_

"_That's enough, Rin."_

_Rin? Rin? Amarra had heard that name before. Normally called by that Jaken thing in a panic as it ran past the bedroom door._

_At the sound of Lord Sesshomaru's command, Rin stopped screaming._

_Sesshomaru realized he could always revive the girl after the fact..._

_But first he would have to find her...and with all of the hair these demons had and their stench it could very well take awhile._

"_I see you have no honor, using a human child as leverage."_

_Rin was a human child? Sesshomaru was keeping a human child? A disgusting thought reached Amarra's mind, but she shook it out quickly. She couldn't imagine Sesshomaru using a human child to satisfy his needs._

"_Pride will not get us what we want."_

"_And what is it that you want?"_

"_To be the ones known as the demons who killed the Lord of the Western Lands." Amarra stated the obvious._

_As the demon looked to see where the feminine voice came from, Sesshomaru reached out, grabbing it by its throat. He lifted it up off the ground. "Speak Rin"_

"_Lord..."_

_Before Rin even finished saying Sesshomaru's name, he had tightened his grip around the demon, squeezing the life out of it quickly. As it limped in death, Rin fell from it, landing somewhat hard at Sesshomaru's feet._

_Sesshomaru tossed the dead leader aside. "Take her inside" he ordered to Amarra, even as the other demons began to run._

"_Yes, Lord Sesshomaru." Rin replied happily as if the order was for her, grabbing Amarra's hand and leading her back._

_Sesshomaru continued to wait until he realized that Rin was out of earshot. And then, in a flash, he chased after the demons...the slaughter beginning._

"_I love being with Lord Sesshomaru." Rin replied happily. "He takes care of Rin."_

"_Takes care of Rin, how?"_

"_Food, and shelter, and Jaken to play with."_

"_That is all?"_

"_What else is there?" Rin asked Amarra._

"_Nothing." Amarra was glad to know that her assumption was correct. This little girl was merely Sesshomaru's ward...not one of his lovers._

"_Lord Sesshomaru!" Rin called as Sesshomaru came into the room. Amarra stood, knowing she needed to go back to the bedroom. She began walking down the hall._

"_Are you well, Rin?" Sesshomaru asked, without an ounce of concern in his voice. Though the fact that he was asking proof of the concern he felt._

"_Yes!" Rin exclaimed._

"_Then go to bed" he would tell her in the morning of the new rule where she was not allowed off the grounds without permission._

_The fact that anyone dared to come so close as those things came today, and using Rin as well, meant that demons were beginning to think Sesshomaru had gone "soft". He would have to be more cautious._

_And, for good measure, he would go on an attacking trip in the near future._

"_Who told you to leave the room?"_

_Amarra managed not to gasp as Sesshomaru was in front of her right as her hand reached the doorknob._

"_No one." Amarra answered honestly._

_Sesshomaru waited, but that was all she had to say. There was no way she was going to apologize for having the "nerve" to leave the room._

_Especially when she was able to cause the distraction that Sesshomaru needed to..._

"_How did you know where Rin was?" she found herself wondering aloud._

"_Anyone who would use a child is a coward. It would make sense that the leader of the cowards would be the one who had Rin. In case things did not go as he planned, then he figured having Rin would be one the thing that would keep, at least him, safe."_

"_Oh." That made sense. _

_  
Sesshomaru opened the door and Amarra walked in. "Your distraction was admittedly helpful."_

_Amarra turned and looked at Sesshomaru, hopefully. Perhaps...he was letting her go for her help?_

"_Would you have protected Run if necessary?"_

_Amarra did not like this line of questioning. "No" she lied._

"_Even if it meant your death?"_

"_Correct."_

_Sesshomaru watched Amarra. She was not being truthful._

_Why humans found the need to lie was another thing he would never understand about them. _

_Sesshomaru closed the remaining space between them and bent so their eyes locked. "Therefore, you are attempting to tell me that if there had been a battle, and Rin was in jeopardy, that you would not have fought for her? Even if it meant fighting by my side?_

_Staring into his eyes, Amarra was unable to answer._

_  
For some reason, realizing it would be impossible to lie at him at time like this._

_She watched as Sesshomaru walked into the room as well. He closed the door, and her eyes followed as went towards the bed. _

"_Disrobe."_

_Amarra began undressing; Sesshomaru watching. He would tell her in the morning._

_A beautiful female warrior who cared enough about a human child to help him save her?_

_A luscious female warrior, who may lie about it, but carved enough about Rin to protect her if necessary._

_She was never going back home._

_He would tell her that in the morning._

_Flashback End._

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Sesshomaru wished he had taken Amarra back to her village now. And though there was a certain...ache without her last night...this morning he decided that he was glad that she was no longer here.

Because the more time he spent with her, the more he wondered if he would ever be as stupid as his father, and half-breed brother...and develop loving feelings for a human.


	6. Happily Ever After? Feh!

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

I want to thank everyone for their reviews! ThebigW, Tajiya, Bellflower and Marryinelmo. You encouraged me to continue when I gave up.

Miroku, Sango, Shippo, Amarra and Kirara stood near Inuyasha.

They had eaten; they were packed.

Now what?

Which way to go?

Inuyasha recognized they were all looking at him for to take some sort of lead.

The thing was that Kagome always was the first one to head somewhere. And they would walk until she sensed a shard.

Without her here to start…

"If Kagome…"

The moment her name left as a whine from Shippo's lips, Inuyasha's ears flattened ever so slightly, Sango noted. She found herself stepping that much closer to him…

A movement lost on Inuyasha, but not Miroku.

"…were here we would know what to do."

"We have to get on without her." Miroku stated calmly, with his characteristic outward never-give-up-attitude. "It will be a challenge, but we're all up to it."

Amarra continued to wonder whom this Kagome was, and why she seemed to be the source of all of the demon child's whines, and the rest of the groups inactivity.

"I have a plan." Sango realized. "You and Inuyasha are the best to sense demon presences. And we've learned that those that are strongest tend to be the ones with shards…"

"You mean to demote Inuyasha to shard detector?" Miroku smirked, hoping Inuyasha would take the bait and clear his thoughts of Kagome.

"Hey!" Inuyasha bit. "She means you too!"

"I am much more than a shard detector. I am a handsome one at that."

Amarra couldn't help but smile at the inside joke she and Miroku seemed to have.

Sango looked at Miroku for a second, "Your ego as Kag…" she stopped herself from finishing the name on her lips. She glanced over at Inuyasha slowly, apologizing to him silently with her eyes.

"Why do you keep looking at me?" Inuyasha wondered out loud.

Sango dropped her eyes, but before she could answer Inuyasha simply sniffed the air and just started to walk.

Shippo hopped on Sango's shoulder and Kirara on Miroku's as they followed.

Amarra stood and took up the rear.

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Inuyasha was still ahead. Sango behind him, with Shippo and Kirara on either shoulder.

She glanced back as Miroku and Amarra stood next to each other now. He was talking and she was listening intently.

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"So, if I am understanding correctly, there is this jewel…that only this Kagome girl could detect…that you are in the search for?"

"Primarily Inuyasha is in search of it now. He wishes to become a full-fledged demon, or so he says. Like Sesshomaru."

Amarra gave a chuckle that caused Miroku to raise his brow.

"What is that amusing?"

Amarra doubted that hanyou could ever be like her Sesshomaru…

Amarra suddenly flushed as the thought fluttered through her mind.

Her Sesshomaru?

She chastised herself for her stupid romantic notions and looked at Miroku once more. "And the rest of you are mainly after this Naraku?"

Miroku noted she didn't answer his question, but decided to let her change the subject. He nodded his head.

"Sango for her brother and slain village, the hanyou for his lost love…"

"You really should call him Inuyasha…" Miroku looked down, his eyes growing as Amarra took his hand in curiosity.

"And you for this?" She lifted his cursed hand, staring at it.

Her fingers were warm…soft for a warrior…Miroku pulled his hand gently away as Inuyasha's warning about her being Sesshomaru's lover played again in his hand.

"Yes."

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They became close rather quickly, Sango realized.

However, for once, Sango wasn't jealous of the attention Miroku was giving to a woman. Maybe because it wasn't his normal perverted attention.

That had to be the reason….Sango's gaze drifted back ahead to Inuyasha.

Inuyasha who had not said anything since they first left the village.

She wondered what he was thinking about?

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"And then they lived happily ever after". Kagome's voice drifted in Inuyasha's mind.

Kagome used to tell Shippo these, what she called, bedtime stories.

They always ended with "And then they lived happily ever after"

Inuyasha hated those stupid stories. Kagome used to say it was because he wasn't so called "romantic".

Inuyasha never told her it was because he considered them lies.

Kikyo used to also tell stories to the children. Inuyasha would sit up in a tree, and listen to her when she was unaware.

Her stories also always ended where everything worked out okay.

Back then, Inuyasha had loved those stories.

They gave him a sense of…faith. Especially when he found out they were true….

Or so Kikyo had said. She must have believed them too.

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_Flashback_

"_Did that really happen?" the little girl looked up at Kikyo, her dark brown eyes wide._

_Inuyasha leaned down from his branch, just a little closer. Curious as to what Kikyo's answer would be._

"_Do you believe it's true?"_

_The rest of the children chimed in with a happy "YES!"_

"_Then it must be so." Kikyo smiled…that beautiful, rare smile, that made Inuyasha's heart beat just a bit faster. "If you have faith in something, nothing is impossible."_

_Flashback end_

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"Feh." Inuyasha said to himself.

Faith his ass.

There obviously was no such thing as happily ever after.

His parents did not have a happily ever after.

Kikyo and he were tricked by Naraku and betrayed each other before they had a chance at happily ever after.

And because he would always love Kikyo, a fact that Kagome obviously couldn't accept, there would be no happily ever after for them either.

Inuyasha could not name anyone who seemed to be living happily ever after.

All lies.

In the end, someone always hurt someone.

Inuyasha suddenly jumped up into a tree.

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Sango gasped as Inuyasha landed in front of her. He tossed something to her and she caught it instinctively.

Sango glanced down at an orange in her hand.

"Can't you go a mere four hours without eating" he answered her unasked question.

Sango blushed, realizing he must have heard her stomach growl. She began to peel the skin of the fruit. "Thank you."

"Feh." Inuyasha glanced down at the enchanted beads around his neck. He hadn't even noticed them until he landed from his jump and they lightly hit his chest.

Damn beads.

Sango noticed where his eyes drifted. She stepped closer, curious…

She had never tried before, because it was how Kagome kept Inuyasha 'in check'. But now that Kagome wasn't here, Sango thought it was a cruel reminder, and wondered if…

Inuyasha looked up as Sango lifted the beads from his neck. "What'd you do that for?"

"You're welcome, Inuyasha." Sango began walking again.

Inuyasha followed her with his eyes…

And as Sango took a bite of her orange, she could have sworn she heard a mumbled "thanks" come from his lips.


	7. Acceptance

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

It seems that sometimes chapters aren't in the pull down menu even though they've been uploaded. If you go to the menu bar and change the number of the chapter there, it should work. Of course I guess this advice will only work after you read this chapter LOL.

Thanks for the feedback Taijiya!

"Child!" Jaken's voice was like a screech in Sesshomaru's sensitive ears, although he was in another castle wing all together. "There is nothing wrong with this food!"

Jaken could care less if Rin ate. But he knew that Sesshomaru cared.

Stupid human child….

"It's not as pretty as Amarra's." Rin mumbled.

"Why should food have to be pretty? It just has to stop you from being hungry."

Before Amarra came, Rin gladly ate whatever Jaken found. Now Rin was even more spoiled.

Stupid human woman for spoiling the stupid human child.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" Rin jumped down from the chair, in a second she was wrapped around his leg. "Good evening!"

"Stupid girl! Let him go!" Jaken did his best to pull Rin from Sesshomaru. Yet Sesshomaru just kept walking, causing Rin to giggle at the "game" she had begun.

"Did you have a nice journey?" Rin asked Sesshomaru.

"He was only away for one day, girl."

One long day without his master Sesshomaru…being stuck here with that damn Rin. Jaken wondered where Sesshomaru went too, but unlike Rin he would never have had the courage to ask.

"Let go."

Rin dropped herself from Sesshomaru's leg at his command. She looked up at him disappearing with her sad brown eyes.

"I am well, Rin" he answered without looking.

Rin smiled, clapping her hands and jumping up from the floor. She ran into her dining area, Jaken following at her heels.

Sesshomaru disappeared inside of his chamber. That scent…

Her scent…

He unsheathed his bloodied Tokijin, inspecting it.

It had been a long time since he made so many killings. It had been a satisfactory way to spend the day.

But now that night was falling, and her scent seemed to be everywhere, he needed…something else.

When Rin was sleeping, he would send Jaken to call for one of his mistresses and have her brought here for the rest of the night.

Whoever Jaken brought would be surprised to be called for. Though he now and again, yet very rarely, had paid a visit to one of them, ever since Amarra lived in the manor, Sesshomaru never asked for someone else to be brought here.

He told himself it was because he didn't want to confuse Rin by having more females coming in and out of their home.

Sometimes, though, he wondered if that was the true reason.

Or whether he just felt those women only deserved to be in the shadows when Amarra was here.

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_Flashback_

_Sesshomaru listened, peaking into his parent's bedroom, tears filling his eyes, as his mother growled at his father, for daring to bring some "human whore" to their home. His father quieted her with a slap, stating this woman was more than a "human whore", that he loved her, and that she was carrying a "pup"._

_He was going to have a sibling? But Sesshomaru knew that this was no reason for joy._

_He felt a sort of pride as his mother stared at her husband, reaching out and returning his slap with one of her own. "You are a disgrace!" she hissed. "We will be back when they are gone…"_

_His father's eyes grew, "You are not taking my son…"_

"_I am leaving. I will not have you disrespecting me in my own home. As long as she is here, I will not be here. As for our son", she emphasized, "He is old enough to decide where he wants to be. Where do you wish to be?!"_

_Sesshomaru gasped, realizing his mother knew that he was here all along. His parents looked at him, two pairs of golden eyes, staring. _

_His father's full of some sort of emotion, his mother's strong…_

_And Sesshomaru cursed himself for the tears in his eyes. While his father was strong in battle…obviously he had these…feelings that were getting in the way._

_Sesshomaru decided there that he wanted to be like his mother._

_In charge, in control._

_His mother left the room, and Sesshomaru dropped his eyes from his father's. Without a word, he dried his own tears and followed his mother out of the room._

_It was months before they returned. His father's "human whore" had had the pup, named him Inuyasha, and moved them into a village "nearby". Far enough that it would take time for the human to get there, but near enough for their father to get there if need-be._

_Sesshomaru's mother didn't speak of the woman, or the half-breed the entire time she and Sesshomaru were gone. And she didn't speak of them upon their return._

_His parents remained together…dying side by side in battle just a couple of human years later._

_Obviously, his mother had forgiven his father. And his father, while loving the human, obviously still loved his mate as well._

_But to Sesshomaru, his mother didn't get the respect that she deserved from his father. _

_His father had the nerve to bring one of his lovers to their home. Had the nerve to have a child with that lover._

_Had the nerve to love that lover._

_Sesshomaru was not so forgiving. And he always remembered._

_The least his father could have done was keep her in the shadows where she belonged. _

_Flashback End_

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Miroku suddenly stopped. "Demonic aura."

Sango couldn't help but roll her eyes as she looked at the village ahead. Well, at least they would yet again have a village to stay in for the falling night. "Of course there…" she stopped speaking as Inuyasha placed his hand on her shoulder stopping her words as he concentrated.

"Coming that way" he looked at Miroku, not really asking, but agreeing.

Miroku nodded

Sango, Shippo and Kirara readied themselves

And Amarra thanked heavens for something to do. She was itching for a fight….

So her shoulders sunk as Miroku added,

"I think it will be awhile before it gets here."

Inuyasha agreed. "Guess we gotta wait."

"Well…." Miroku stretched with a smile. "I think we need to inform the villagers that a demon is headed their way, but we will be glad to stop it…" and with a hum he started towards it.

"Why is he so happy?" Amarra wondered aloud.

"Because he is the most un-monk-like monk there is." Sango couldn't help but answer.

"But he does get us nice food and a warm place to sleep." Shippo chimed in defense.

At least today would not be a total waste. They had only been traveling for one day, and if that demon headed here had at least one shard, then Inuyasha would have proved to himself that him and his new group still would be able to get their tasks done. Even without Kagome.

Inuyasha took up the rear as he always did when they headed towards a village. It usually took Miroku and Kagome to convince villagers that Inuyasha should be allowed to stay there.

Inuyasha assumed Sango would take up that slack and help Miroku as she had last night.…and he thanked her silently as he watched as Shippo's tail switched from his perch on her shoulder.

She had been taking up a lot of Kagome's responsibilities. Mothering Shippo….

Conversing with Inuyasha….

Inuyasha wouldn't say it, but of all of his friends,

Though he appreciated Miroku

And even having Shippo around.

Already, it was Sango who Inuyasha was most glad was still with him on this journey.

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Kikyo did not even bother to ready her bow and arrow. She also didn't turn around as she asked, "Which incarnation are you?"

"Kanna." Kanna answered in her soft voice.

Kikyo faced her now. "What do you want?"

Kanna held up her mirror and with an annoyed sigh, Kikyo looked into it. "Inuyasha" she noted, her voice flat…

Her heart racing as his handsome…no…beautiful…form moved slowly in front of her eyes

"What is the point of this Kagura…"

Damn it. Why did this priestess always know when she was near. Kagura flew down from the sky. "Don't you notice something different about him?"

Aside from that missing Kagome not being attached to his hip any longer? Kikyo thanked the heavens silently.

"He seems to be missing…something." Kagura waited.

Kikyo stared at her, not answering. And then in a second she turned and walked away.

Kagura told Naraku it was a waste of time. Kikyo could care less about Inuyasha.

Kagura produced her feather, and she and Kanna flew away.

Kikyo continued her stroll.

His enchanted beads were gone.

Someone had removed them. Thankfully. Kikyo never understood what right Kagome had to 'sit' Inuyasha in order to keep him in control. It seemed so…petty.

Kaede, maybe?

Did Kagome return, only to remove them herself, and then leave once more?

Though these questions ran through her mind, Kikyo did not really need the answers to them.

There was just one question that really mattered.

Did something change?

She lifted her hand to the sky, and one of her soul collectors landed. "Go" she whispered, and watched as it led others off.

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Inuyasha growled, the sound so low in his throat, that it actually reminded Amarra of Sesshomaru, and she had to stop her body from reacting.

Though it worked yesterday, today it seemed that Sango and Miroku weren't as convincing as Kagome and Miroku .

"Then fuck them! I can't stay, then let them protect themselves!" he began walking again…but stopped as he noticed only Amarra was following. Inuyasha turned, and started at the rest of them.

"We do not have that luxury." Miroku answered honestly.

"What?!"

"Inuyasha…" Sango moved closer. "What if it has a shard? We cannot pass up this opportunity just because the people here are…ignorant. We'll all just stay nearby…"

"Why should we have to stay nearby?" Shippo answered. "They said the rest of us could stay."

Shippo was always allowed in…because he was so young…so…cute.

Even as a child, Inuyasha didn't have that luxury. Guess he wasn't cute enough….Inuyasha turned his back on everyone.

"Does that sound fair to you?" Sango looked at Shippo.

"No…" Shippo admitted as Miroku's eyes glared at him as well.

"He is gone anyway."

"What?" Miroku glanced as Amarra spoke.

Amarra turned her attention to the rest of them. "Though it is not fair" even she agreed with the other adults Shippo noted, "the hanyou…"

"Inuyasha…" All three of them attempted to correct her.

"…made the decision on his own, and ran off that way somewhere. " And with that she headed back to the village. Shippo jumped from Sango's shoulder to hers to get away from the angry gaze from Sango and Miroku.

"We might as well go, then." Miroku relented.

"And have him think we abandoned him?" Sango shook his head. "I'm going to find him…" she stopped speaking as Miroku touched her arm.

"He did not go far; he will want to be here in case there is a shard coming this way. I suggest you leave him be. He is not Shippo, he does not always need to be watched. And sometimes one just wants to be alone."

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Damn…bastards….

Inuyasha ran faster, his anger growing by the second. His pain growing by the nano-second.

And he would be forced to save them all probably.

Unlike Shippo, even as a young pup, Inuyasha had never felt accepted by humans.

Except for a select few…

Suddenly Inuyasha came to a stop. "Kikyo…" he breathed as her soul collectors circled above him. One of them took off, and Inuyasha immediately started to follow.

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"We can't leave him alone now! He will close off if we leave him alone!" Sango's voice actually raised.

Miroku lowered his gaze from Sango's intense stare. So passionate Sango was.

And about Inuyasha?

They were becoming so close it seemed.

Though Miroku always kept the thought to himself, part of him thought that though Inuyasha's feelings for Kagome were real, that they never had a chance to develop without the literal ghost of Kikyo there. Kagome was Kikyo's reincarnation. And while Kagome was a person in her own right…the fact was that Kagome was Kikyo's reincarnation. Miroku wouldn't have been surprised if that wasn't what originally drew Kagome and Inuyasha towards each other.

And Miroku understood why Inuyasha could not just stop loving one to love the other.

Sango was…just Sango.

Sango understood what it was like to lose someone to trickery and death, to Naraku, the way the way that Inuyasha lost Kikyo.

Sango could accept Kikyo in a way Kagome never could…and would have been unfair for her to be asked to.

And if Inuyasha and Sango ever were to be together, or Inuyasha and anyone who was not so closely tied to Kikyo, Miroku knew his friend had the strength of character to stay with her. Had the kind of heart to be with her only.

So while normally Miroku would be jealous, he knew even Inuyasha would be a better suitor for Sango than he.

"Miroku?" Amarra's voice reached his ears and though he kept his hand on Sango's arm, he turned his head to look at Amarra.

That was the only reason, right?

"Are you and Sango coming?" Shippo asked the next question.

Miroku looked at Sango again. "We do not know what it is like to be him. Don't we owe him the respect of leaving him to his own mind when he is rudely reminded that not everyone is as good, open-minded and as lovely you…"

Sango's face grew red as Miroku's hand groped her familiarly.

Amarra winced slightly, Shippo shaking his head as Sango slapped Miroku across his face. Then with a huff, she walked towards the village.

Miroku smiled to himself, rubbing his cheek. He would have to find a less painful way to distract Sango.

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Sesshomaru stared up blankly as the nude demon on top of him pushed her long blue hair from her face. She bent down to kiss him, but Sesshomaru moved his face out of the way.

"I suggest you finish before I do. Because then you leave."

The demon stopped, her red eyes glowing at his rejection, yet she continued moving on top of him as Sesshomaru allowed the natural physical pleasure to cause him to shut his eyes.

Lucky for her, she finished before him, because true to his word, Sesshomaru made her leave not just the room but also his castle.

At least Amarra's scent was not here anymore.

That put his mind a bit more at ease. It was easier for his mind to accept she didn't need to be here.

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"I was not sure you would come." Kikyo looked down from the tree branch.

Inuyasha looked up at her. "Kikyo…" he breathed once more.

Kikyo had to stop her eyes from shutting as her name came from Inuyasha's lips.

"How could you not be sure I would come, Kikyo."

Kikyo wanted to stop him from saying her name. Beg him not to say her name. It made her want to believe… that she really did matter in Inuyasha's heart.

"I always come, Kikyo."

No…she refused to allow herself to get caught up…refused. She needed to stick to the matter at hand. "Something is different." she noted, her collectors lowering her to the ground to be in front of Inuyasha.

Inuyasha dropped his eyes from hers as he admitted, "Kagome has left for good."

Kikyo did not answer. Her alleged reason for calling Inuyasha here was now answered. Kagome was not coming back this time. And while that thought filled her with a joy…in part…

A part of her ached for Inuyasha.

Why should she ache for Inuyasha? Did he ache for her all of those times he ran off with Kagome and left Kikyo alone? Refused to go with Kikyo to hell so he could stay here for that damned pitiful reincarnation of her?

That familiar bitterness filled Kikyo, thankfully. It would stop her from feeling so close to…"Inuyasha."

Inuyasha looked up as Kikyo called him, and as their eyes locked, Kikyo knew….there was more, wasn't there?

Was Kagome the only cause of his pain? No. There seemed to be something…more…

"Something else bothers you?" she couldn't help but ask.

His eyes grew slightly, as hers seemed…warmer towards him somehow. He ventured closer. "You still care."

Too close…Kikyo stepped back. "No." she lied. "But when you are bothered, Naraku gains the upper hand" she rationalized. "And Naraku is aware" she warned. "That you are missing her."

Missing…right now…once more Inuyasha moved closer, and this time it was Kikyo who's eyes grew slightly.

He gave a damn about Kagome…about Naraku.

Kikyo was here…and he could…

Kikyo gasped as Inuyasha pulled her to him. He wrapped his arms around her, waiting for her to struggle…waiting for her to freeze.

She always struggled. Always froze.

Then she would relent momentarily and they would hold each other. And he would allow himself to think that she accepted that he truly did love her still.

Only for her to pull away, calling him a fool…ripping a hole in his heart all over again.

Yet, this time, Kikyo did not struggle.

She did not have the strength this time. Her love for Inuyasha was too strong to resist him right now.

She cursed herself…she did not want to love him so much.

She cursed herself again for lying…she needed to love him this much.

No…she couldn't let herself….if she trusted them, she would make mistakes. She trusted them in life and wound up without him. So she tried to will herself to believe, to remind herself why Inuyasha came, why he was here, by saying aloud, "You only came because Kagome is not here."

"Kagome never stopped me from coming."

"Yes, I know, she is such a wonderful…" Kikyo had to stop the words from spitting out…

"She never…could…stop me from coming to you. That is why she left."

Kikyo's eyes closed….her body was so warm as it always was when Inuyasha held her…and for the first time she knew how real it was.

They still were.

And as she slowly wrapped her arms around him, Inuyasha closed his eyes, the rest of the world not mattering.

He felt that acceptance.

And when she pulled away this time, her eyes remained…loving….as she looked at him

And it did not hurt as badly as he watched Kikyo's soul collectors wrap around her.

Inuyasha stared into the sky as silently she disappeared.

Kikyo did still care.

Of this much, Inuyasha was now sure.

They couldn't be together…at least not yet…maybe even never…

But knowing Kikyo still cared for him was enough for Inuyasha right now.


	8. And Now? Sango

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

Thanks and Notes: Taijiya-yea for fluffiness! If the rating ever goes up there will be lemons too ;)

The Big W—Ah, life. Don't you hate it when life gets in the way of fun? The beads and Sango will be explained one day. And Kikyo…I just love Kikyo. I think that some people take her too much at face value; but I find her to be complex and really interesting. Anywhoo, this chapter is especially dedicated to you. I love your idea of inner dialogues, and I've decided everyone will have at least one dedicated to them about where they are in mind and heart at a particular time. So thanks.

Everyone—If any of you ever have a preference or idea when one of these inner dialogues would especially benefit one of the characters, let me know. If it works, then I'll put it in next.

Ashe—Thanks for trying; I appreciate it. Who knows (cause I haven't decided for sure who will end up where at the end yet) maybe Sesshomaru will wind up alone.

Dreams will be in bold (hopefully).

Sango finished her dinner. She wanted to take a bath now, however, that was probably a bad idea. Maybe a rest…."How much longer?" She looked over at Miroku. Miroku put down his bowl of rice and closed his eyes momentarily.

"Awhile still" he decided. He began eating once more.

Sango nodded and stood. "I will go for a walk then."

Amarra glanced over at Sango, figuring she was going to go searching for the hanyou. Miroku had the same thought, but before he could express it, Sango called for Kirara and they left the hut.

When Sango got outside, she looked ahead. The forest was in her sight, but she realized that Miroku was probably right. Though she would never tell him, often Miroku was right.

She had no idea what Inuyasha was going through right now, and she should probably leave him alone for a bit.

Besides, there were times when all she wanted was to be alone.

She started the other way, Kirara bounding next to her. They walked in silence for a bit, until Sango found a small hill that peaked her interest. It would be a good place to sit and think, maybe allow her eyes to close she decided, hiking to the top.

Once she arrived, she sat down and Kirara jumped into her lap. Sango stroked her fire cat's fur, and soon Kirara was purring contently, her eyes shut to the world. Meanwhile, Sango looked up at the sky.

The moon's silver glow was captivating and she basked in its beauty. Kagome would say it was 'awesome'.

Kagome…

Sango missed her friend. Having someone to talk to about…things. Though normally it was Kagome who did the talking, who put into words Sango's attraction to Miroku. Sango would generally protest, but Kagome was very perceptive about such things.

Which is why Sango was angry with her now too.

Since Kagome was so perceptive, how could she just leave Inuyasha the way she did?

Did she not know how devastated Inuyasha would be without a good-bye?

That was what angered Sango. Not that Kagome left. As was said to Shippo, Kagome had every right to leave once she determined that Inuyasha would never be able to give her what she needed.

Yet, Inuyasha deserved a goodbye.

They all could have used a goodbye.

But Inuyasha…deserved one.

There was a time when Sango figured it was best for her to split with the group. A time when she would have just run off without a word.

But those days were long passed. She couldn't imagine just….leaving. No matter the reason.

Sango found herself wondering what would be the reaction if she decided to leave. Shippo would be the one it would affect most, she gathered. Yet, however, it was becoming clear that Amarra seemed to have a way with Shippo that would make her a good "mother" to the kit. Unlike Sango and Miroku, Amarra had no emotional ties to Shippo, yet she had a much more subdued temper than Inuyasha, so she was good at letting Shippo know when he was in the wrong.

Something Kagome never did.

Shippo was rather spoiled because of it, Sango now realized.

Amarra would fix that if she had the chance.

And Sango thought that perhaps Amarra would be a good enough replacement for Miroku if Sango decided to leave.

Technically, there was nothing between Miroku and Sango. Kagome always figured they would be together, there was a time when Sango wished for such. Even now, she couldn't say for sure that they wouldn't be together when all was said and done.

Actually she could.

The time for her and Miroku seemed to have passed somehow.

Sango sighed, the silver of the moon just didn't compare to…

Inuyasha.

Sango already admitted that Inuyasha held an appeal. That she could see what led Kikyo to him time and time again. That she could see what Kagome found so appealing.

Sango figured she could have developed a so-called crush on Inuyasha if left to her own devices. Yet, she hadn't been. She pretty much pushed those thoughts down, because it was soon obvious that Kagome had feelings for Inuyasha, and vice versa.

Kagome and Sango became so close so quickly, that Sango saw it as a sort of betrayal to Kagome each time she found herself drawn to look at Inuyasha.

Yet…Sango's cheeks grew warm….even that guilt never stopped her from stealing glances at him now and again.

And now, with Kagome no longer there and never coming back, it seemed that this attraction just was…exploding within Sango. As if Sango pushed it down down down for too long…and now her subconscious saw a chance to let it escape.

Yet, none of it made any sense to Sango. Miroku was so handsome in his own right, yet once Sango decided her attraction to him was a bad strategic thing, it was just…never more. She hadn't even found herself admiring him lately. Not even wanting to.

However, Inuyasha…

Despite knowing that being attracted to Inuyasha was even worse…she just couldn't help it.

What was that about?

In fact, if she were to leave the group, Sango was sure that Inuyasha wouldn't bat a beautiful eye. Hell, Amarra would probably be more affected merely by being the lone female of the group. Inuyasha wouldn't care less if Sango weren't around.

The thought hit her like a slap, and Sango found her eyes tearing at the stinging pain.

Sango took a shuddering breath, refusing to allow them to escape. She laid down in the grass, closing her eyes to the moon now, her stomach fluttering as Kirara moved from her lap, walking in a circle and settling in a ball on top of her.

Why was she thinking of any of this anyway? She was not leaving the group.

Not until she had Kohaku back.

Not until Naraku was burning in hell.

That was her focus. Yes, she needed to help take care of Shippo now that Kagome was gone.

Yes, she was determined not to let Inuyasha draw into himself not that Kagome was gone.

But those would be secondary…had to be secondary.

With that reminder, Sango allowed herself to join Kirara in a nap.

But as her conscious mind rested, her subconscious was allowed to play…

In her dream, there was no Naraku…no Kohaku…

Just her…

And…

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**Sango gasped as Miroku's hand groped her familiarly. She flushed red in anger and slapped him.**

"**What the fuck was that for, bitch!"**

**Sango's eyes grew and she pulled back from the hold to find herself staring into Inuyasha's golden eyes. "I thought you were Miroku…" she stuttered quickly.**

"**Do I look like Miroku to you!" Inuyasha rubbed his cheek with his hand.**

"**No…" Sango's voice came out in a breath.**

"**You're staring at me again!" Inuyasha barked now, "Since Kagome left you're always staring at me!" **

"**I know. However I cannot seem to stop…" **

"**Why?"**

" **I…do not know…" even as her cheeks flushed in embarrassment now, Sango could not tear her gaze from Inuyasha.**

"**I think you do." His tone suddenly grew soft.**

"**No…" yet as the word escaped her lips, Sango knew it was a lie.**

"**I think you do" he repeated. **

"**I…cannot…"**

"**Here you can. Here…anything is possible." Inuyasha stepped closer to Sango, reaching up with his hand, the claws of his fingers stroking her cheek softly, sending a shudder through her.**

"**You are so…gentle…" Sango could not help but notice.**

"**At times." Inuyasha agreed with a nod. "I would never admit to such out there. Yet, you already know it is true."**

**Sango nodded in agreement. "Usually you're so…passionate" her body tightened for a reason unknown to her. "And beautiful…"**

"**Feh. A woman is beautiful…"**

"**Inuyasha, you are beautiful."**

**Light entered Inuyasha's eyes at Sango's admission. "I ain't thanking you if you expect it. Even in here."**

"**I do not expect it. You as who you are is what I am intrigued by."**

"**Is that why you stare?"**

**Sango nodded once more. "That is why I stare. Inuyasha?"**

"**What?"**

"**In here…would you care if I left?"**

"**Feh. That's the dumbest question I've heard since Kagome left. I gotta question for you. What the hell are you doing out here alone unarmed!"**

"**What?"**

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"I said what the hell are you doing out here alone, unarmed you stupid wench!"

Sango's eyes shot open to find Inuyasha leaning over her, his hair blowing in the night wind. He was so close, a strand of it brushed against her cheek and the startle sent her flying upright.

"Why are you so close!"

"Because you didn't hear me the first time I asked. Get with the others." He stood straight as well. "It will be here soon. I'll be in the nearest tree…"

Sango's heart finally slowed to a more normal pace and she watched as Inuyasha surveyed the area.

"Will you go already!"

"You will get enough of yelling at me in a moment." Sango warned.

"Go!"

Sango stepped back at Inuyasha's command.

"We don't know what's headed this way, or how strong it is. And I won't be responsible for something happening to you because you ain't prepared! Shippo whines enough as is…Why are you staring at me!"

Because you are beautiful, appealing and I am intrigued by you, Inuyasha. Sango admitted to herself. But outward she replied, "I am not" before calling to Kirara. She grew in preperation for battle, and Sango hopped on top. In a moment they were off.

Sango couldn't help but look back to Inuyasha. But he was already gone.

Inuyasha worried about her, which did not surprise Sango…but it was a reminder to what she realized now was in fact a dumb question.

Inuyasha would in fact miss Sango if she just left.

Sango realized that now.


	9. Evening Thoughts

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

Thank you for the feedback Taijiya!

Sesshomaru continued staring out of the window at the night sky. Other than a slight evening breeze, the picture was deceptively calm. Yet, he could smell the demon activity coming from many differing locations. Somewhere merely walking, some were fighting, some were mating.

He closed his eyes, very faintly…but still there. His brother's scent seemed to be growing from what humans would deem far away. The increasing strength of it meant that Inuyasha was running for some reason.

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Flashback 

_Sesshomaru's parents had been dead for only a few hours when he walked into his father's den. There were a lot of scents in here…he was having problems pinpointing who and what was who and what. His father's smell was the strongest of course…his mother's was nowhere to be found. Not surprisingly. Neither Sesshomaru nor his mother was allowed here. _

_Servants, blood, ink…Sesshomaru covered his nose…that scent was strong and rare to his sensitive nose. It took him a moment but soon he was relatively used to it. His father must have written something before going off to battle. _

_  
Sure enough, there was an envelope, with Sesshomaru's name on it on the desk. Sesshomaru ripped it open, pulling the letter out…his eyes scanned through a bunch of what he considered meaningless thoughts lies, about caring, and feelings….only paying attention once he found what he was looking for _

_Aside from taking his rightful place as the Lord of the Western Lands and receiving all that it entailed, he was to be left something called the Tenseiga._

_It seemed that Inuyasha was to be left the wondrous Tetseigua. Sesshomaru had heard of that sword. It was all people spoke of for days. Sesshomaru should have known that damn bastard of a half-brother would get it. _

_Sesshomaru had not even heard of the Tenseiga. _

_Maybe it would make no difference anyway. Yet, Sesshomaru could not help but feel more hatred for his so-called little brother. The thing did not even deserve to be on this world, yet not only was he here, he was stopping Sesshomaru from getting what was rightfully his. _

_He didn't even notice as his eyes glowed red…_

_Just as suddenly, they were back to normal. _

_Why waste anger on a child. A child he had not even yet seen. _

_That was the main reason he was in here. Sesshomaru moved to his father's chair, and bent. He closed his eyes. His father……there…very faint…at least that human wench had not been in here either. But the scent that must be her was still here. It was probably on the clothes his father had worn when sitting in this chair._

_Now to find the woman and child._

_And kill him._

_Sesshomaru had been waiting for this day._

_Sesshomaru was disappointed to reach the hut to find it empty. She was one lucky human. He walked around for a second, before closing is eyes._

_There. That must be it._

_She wasn't why he was here anyway. Now that he had found that scent he was looking for, Inuyasha was dead._

_Sesshomaru focused as he seemed to literally soar through the air. The scent grew stronger as he grew closer….yet, suddenly it grew even stronger…_

_Limping, Inuyasha continued to run as best he could from the people chasing him. He had wandered too far from the safety of his mother. All he had wanted to do was play with the other children, they had beat him instead. _

_He had let them._

_His mother explained once, with tears in her eyes, that he could not afford to strike the children back. He was much stronger than they, and he could hurt them…could kill them, even if he did not mean to._

_Inuyasha was always very careful. So he took his beating like the strong little man his mother liked to call him, and said a thankful prayer when a couple of adults came by. He was even more thankful when he noticed they were not from his village. _

_He thought that they would stop it._

_He was right at first. They stopped the beating and sent the children on their way. Only to stare at Inuyasha with growing disgust as his dog-like features caught their eye._

_That was when the chase began._

"_There he is!"_

"_Get him!"_

_Inuyasha somehow managed to pick up speed._

_Sesshomaru watched from a tree as a streak of red grew closer…by the looks of him, that was him…_

_Inuyasha turned, looking behind him for a second…_

_Seemed that someone had beat the pup already._

_Damn humans._

_What right did they have to abuse his little brother?_

_That was his job._

_Sesshomaru waited until Inuyasha had run past, before jumping down from the tree._

_Inuyasha froze, covering his sensitive ears at the blood-chilling screams filling the air. Slowly he turned around…bodies…_

_Dead bodies…blood of the men chasing him forming in pools…_

_Suddenly, Inuyasha gasped as he found himself being by the collar. He squirmed to no avail, and with a tiny gulp he looked up…_

_  
When he wasn't struck, Inuyasha stopped moving, and as he stared into the stranger's face, a sense of safety came over him. The stranger reminded him of himself. _

_He would be okay now. _

_Sesshomaru readied his claw. And then glanced down for a moment, staring into Inuyasha's tiny face. The boy smiled…had the nerve to smile at him…and his ears twitched excitedly for some reason._

_The nerve._

"_Why do you let them chase you?"_

_That answer was obvious, so Inuyasha looked around, as if this stranger was talking to someone other than him. Yet, the question was in fact for him. "I did not want them to chase me."_

_Sesshomaru actually sighed. "I mean why do you run from them?"_

"_They want to hurt me."_

"_All the more reason for you to stand up for yourself." Sesshomaru dropped Inuyasha to the ground. _

"_They are bigger. And there were two!" _

"_I stand right before you. Do not raise your voice"_

_Inuyasha stood from the ground with a nod. "I am sorry."_

"_Your apologies mean nothing to me."_

_Did their father teach the pup nothing?_

_No….of course not._

_Their father never saw the pup. He and Inuyasha's mother deemed it too dangerous. As if seeing the now deceased Lord of the Western Lands with Inuyasha would scare the villagers further. As if they were looking to the future of what Inuyasha could become. _

_Sesshomaru looked down at the bruise forming on Inuyasha's cheek. Remembering how Inuyasha limped as he ran._

_Idiots. If the humans beat Inuyasha like this when he was a pup, who knew what they were capable of if reminded that he would one day grow to be a strong…well as strong as possible…hanyou._

_Sesshomaru would not kill Inuyasha while he was still a child running from humans._

_What would be the point, the honor in that._

_Sesshomaru picked Inuyasha up once more and started towards the village at a speed that put Inuyasha in even more awe. "You can run faster than you were." Sesshomaru chastised._

"_No…"_

"_Yes. You can." He dropped Inuyasha again. He could see the village from here. "Your speed had better have improved by the next time we meet."_

_Inuyasha's grin widened. They would meet again? _

_Sesshomaru ignored the smiling child, and turned to walk away. But before he even took three steps, he felt small arms around his leg. Sesshomaru froze, looking down at Inuyasha. "Inuyasha."_

_Inuyasha's eyes grew. He knew his name? He, called him by name? No one called him by name except for his Mama. _

"_Can you smell me?"_

_Inuyasha released Sesshomaru's leg at the odd question._

"_You should be able to recognize the scent even when I am gone." He began walking again. _

"_Do you hafta go?"_

_Sesshomaru did not answer, and Inuyasha watched in wonder as he disappeared in a flash. _

_Inuyasha looked at the village again. And then he took off, running as fast as he could. As he reached the edge of town, he turned around…no…for some reason Inuyasha closed his eyes._

_He jumped in delight as the scent of the stranger reached him, even from this distance. _

_Inuyasha ran even faster to his hut._

_He would run everywhere for days, to his mother's surprise._

_He needed to be faster for the next time he met the other._

_Flashback End_

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As a human, Amarra's scent was fainter than Inuyasha's, but still there. Sesshomaru moved from the window, leaving his chamber all together.

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_Flashback_

_She had spent a lot of her day crying from silently from what she mistakenly thought was the safety of her room._

_Sesshomaru could smell the salt of Amarra's tears from down the hall._

_He would allow her one day to wallow in self-pity, but if she had not stopped crying by the time day broke, he would…_

_Well…_

_There would be some sort of punishment._

_Emotional female…all because she could not go back to that pitiful village she lived in. She had accepted his decision with the dignity of a warrior he thought, at first. _

_She knew automatically she had no choice in the matter. Or her entire village would be slain._

_She knew him well enough to know that._

_Amarra did not bother to wipe the tears falling from her eyes. But she cried silently, not wanting to give that bastard the satisfaction of hearing her sobs with his damned dog hearing._

_Besides..she figured that eventually he would grow tire of her. _

_Her tears began to dry as she took comfort in the fact that he would eventually be done with her. And then perhaps let her go home for good._

_Or kill her._

_  
Whichever suited her._

_Even if she had found herself attracted to him…a bit…she reluctantly admitted, that was over the moment he forbade her to leave._

_She did not want to be living here away from her family and friends with some damned demon lord who thought of her as nothing but a body for his use._

_Of course…she knew he saw her as more than that as well. That was why she wasn't allowed to go home now. All because she had been noisy and helped him save that little girl._

_It wasn't Rin's fault though. Amarra promised herself not to take anything out on the child, even though she figured if she did, it would be the quickest way to a now looked forward to death at the hands of Sesshomaru._

_Then she refused to eat…and even cried all day. _

_Pathetic human woman._

_Though, he could not hear her cries…Sesshomaru had to give her that much. At least she was not wailing and hurting his ears. _

_Rin ate her mid-day meal, and Sesshomaru could tell that Amarra's moments of tears were coming less frequently._

_Rin ran herself to sleep, and by then the smell of Amarra's tears had not come forth in hours._

_Though not as pathetic as the rest of the human women._

_Flashback End_

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Sesshomaru walked past Jaken. "Gather the girl, Ah-Un, and meet me outside before I decide to leave without you."

"Yes, my lord!" Jaken scurried away.

They would head the opposite direction of Inuyasha and Amarra. More distance between them was needed.


	10. Just Is

My profile name changed because I realized that unless Sesshomaru is on, I'm usually completely bored with the show as of late, but the stories I'm still addicted too.

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

Thank you for the kind words and feedback: TheBigW, Bellflower, Borrowlover (the flashbacks allow me to help define/explore characters and their relationships without messing up what's currently going on. Otherwise this would be a damn long story and would have begun waaaay back before Inuyasha is born-smile), Taijiya (I love Sess and Inu flashbacks/stories too), Xblubbugx, and Icygirl.

I'm a lover not a fighter, okay that was bad, but anyway, there won't be descriptive fight scenes in my story.

Sango hopped off of Kirara, "It's…"

"I know." Miroku held her Hiraikotsu in his hand. "Do you know where Inuyasha…"

"Inuyasha says he will be in a nearby tree" she answered, taking her weapon with a thankful nod.

"I should have known you'd realize where he was."

Sango took the time to blush slightly, cursing silently that she really had to right to slap him because of words.

"It picked up speed suddenly." Miroku explained, his eyes surveying the area.

Sango turned, looking as Amarra went to the other side of Miroku just as a dark cloud covered the moon above them.

Like lightening, Inuyasha suddenly appeared. He wasn't just going to leave his friends to hang out in some tree he decided. He stood in front of his group, igniting a scream of "DEMON!" from a few people strolling by.

"Shut up!" Inuyasha ordered. He wanted to be completely focused….

"Up there!" Miroku called out. Everyone looked up, but…

"There's nothing up there." Sango and Amarra said in unison, even as their hands tightened their weapons in preparation.

Inuyasha couldn't see anything either…but his other senses told him better. He could hear…smell…movement but it was coming so fast he couldn't pinpoint…

By the time Miroku realized where the demon was headed, it was too late, and suddenly he flew back, as the invisible enemy struck him, landing hard against the wall of the hut. With a wince, he fell to the ground. "Miroku!" Shippo ran over from what they thought was the relative safety of the doorway as Sango looked over at him to make sure he was all right. His jaw twitched in uncharacteristic anger at what Kagome would call a sucker punch, but otherwise he was okay. Sango moved up, gauging by the angle at which he flew, from what direction he was hit. "That way…" she guessed quietly.

Inuyasha nodded. "Have some honor and show yourself coward!"

Miroku stood his hands on his beads in case the wind tunnel was needed, "Shippo get back…" he ordered, not noticing as his words stopped Amarra from edging closer to Miroku as well

Stopping her advancement towards the monk she had already felt the desire to protect from harm for some reason that was unknown to her, but she didn't question.

Why would he do something that stupid and show himself? The invisible demon smiled to himself, a breathy chuckle coming from its lips as he moved towards his next target...

That was all Inuyasha needed, and he started to smirk, until a gust of wind gave him an idea of who the demon's next target was. "Stay away!" he ordered as he jumped in the air "Iron Reaver…"

Sango gasped as she suddenly found herself pushed not so gently out of the way by Inuyasha as he landed,

"Soul Stealer!"

A scream pierced the air, and two jewel shards suddenly appeared, as the invisible demon grew visible as it fell to the ground in death.

"We'll be taking those." Inuyasha caught the falling shards, putting them with the rest.

"How in the hell did he…" Amarra began to herself.

"Seemed to think knocking you down was funny." Inuyasha teased Miroku, unknowingly giving Amarra the answer to her question. She surely didn't hear it, but that dog hearing must run in the family….

"Yes, well, glad to have been of help." Miroku nodded. "He was rather easy for you to defeat."

"Did you have any doubt!" Inuyasha cut his eyes. "Everyone is easy for me to defeat…"

Sango rolled her eyes until Inuyasha held his hand out, even as he still looked at everyone else while he finished

"…but the rest of you need to pull your weight, or I'm just going to leave you behind!"

Sango took Inuyasha's hand and he pulled her from the ground.

"Pardon…"

Miroku put his hand on Amarra's shoulder stopping her annoyance as he shook his head. "Inuyasha is what our friend would call all bark and no bite. He says things he does not really mean."

"Feh."

"See." Miroku smirked. "So, our first battle went off without a hitch."

"Yes, it was rather boring." Amarra sighed. "Are they all that way with the glory hog?"

Sesshomaru always allowed her to fight during battles….

"Hey! You can't talk to me that way!" Inuyasha snapped.

"I am not speaking to you, I am speaking of you." Amarra answered simply.

"You know…"

This time it was Sango who placed her hand on someone's shoulder; Inuyasha's. "She's probably just wondering if you will allow her to speak her mind. I am sure that your brother did not."

To prove he was better than Sesshomaru, as Sango figured Inuyasha would want to, he decided to let Amarra's attitude slide for the moment, something that only made Amarra's anger grow.

She hated the way those two spoke of Sesshomaru…as if Inuyasha were better than him somehow. They knew nothing of Sesshomaru…or their relationship, yet they had the gall to think he was better than HER Sesshomaru…

Miroku noted the ever-growing hostility radiating from Amarra and sighed. He said a silent prayer…

Suddenly Amarra's eyes grew. She turned her head slowly, and though Miroku was looking up at the sky, his hand continued to stroke against her rear. At least Sesshomaru hadn't shown up from nowhere. Now Miroku just had to wait for the smack he knew was coming.

But suddenly she just laughed.

Miroku looked into her eyes, and Amarra shook her head at him as her giggle continued. "You…are a rather un-monk-like monk." Amarra smiled as Sango's description of Miroku ran across her mind. She moved his hand from her body and with another small laugh, walked back into the hut.

Leaving everyone,

Especially Miroku

Completely dumbfounded.

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He could have stayed with the others. But he had too much pride for that. These people didn't want him in the village before he killed the demon, he wasn't giving them the satisfaction of staying there now. Fuck them.

He liked being in the trees anyway. He thought best when there was the slight rustle of leaves in his ear.

And right now the rustle had formed this thought in his mind: No matter what Sesshomaru was like, Inuyasha refused to take attitude from a human. Next time Amarra was getting a….suddenly his thoughts turned, and his anger at that dead demon rose a bit once more.

Inuyasha could smell Sango's scent coming even though she wasn't yet in his view.

That damn demon was headed straight for an unknowing Sango before Inuyasha struck him down. He had the nerve to try and attack Sango on his watch…

Feh.

Inuyasha didn't think so….

Sango's scent grew closer. She was probably going to take a bath in the hot springs across from him.

She was by herself; Amarra's scent wasn't anywhere around. She reached his view, and as he figured she headed straight for the steaming water. She glanced around, and Inuyasha figured she was looking for Miroku.. Finding it clear, Sango reached up and lowered her clothes from her shoulders

As Inuyasha's eyes grew.

She had no idea he was here…and if he were perverted…his body stirred a bit as more of her skin showed…

Automatic reaction he told himself as he jumped down from the tree, landing at her feet. He refused to think there could be more to it. She was Sango…and he didn't see her like that…

Right?

"Inuyasha!" her voice brought him from his thoughts. He didn't have time for this…

"I was here first" he pointed at her accusingly as she hurried to cover herself completely. "I didn't see nothing,"

that was that bad…nothing private per se….

"and I wasn't trying to"

though he could have showed himself before she even began undressing….

"I'm not Miroku" his last sentence was almost the same as her dream of him earlier in the evening, and she had to look at the ground to stop her face from flushing in remembrance. "I was here first."

"I would not accuse you of spying." Sango stated. "I realize that you are not Miroku."

And I am not Kagome or Kikyo.

"So therefore I do not expect you to spy."

"Okay then…long as we got that straight."

And before Sango could answer, Inuyasha had jumped into the trees once more. There were some sounds, growing more and more distant by each nano-second, and she could tell he was moving so she would be out of his view and she could bathe safe from his eyes.

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Now that an hour had passed since the battle, Miroku's body ached from the hit he took. He had offered to join Sango in the hot springs before she just left, and she had, of course, slapped him across the face before storming off in a huff.

He had only asked her out of habit really. Not that he wouldn't have gone had she for some reason agreed…of course he would have. He wasn't blind to her beauty or too stupid not to take a chance to see her naked if she allowed it. However once he realized he could not be the man she deserved, while he went through familiar actions with her, there was no real intent behind it anymore.

But really, he did need to take a trip to the hot springs. He hoped she came back soon. Perhaps he would meditate until then…"What?"

"I asked if you were all right." Amarra repeated. "You look like you are in pain."

"I am fine." Miroku smiled, but it faded as Amarra cut her eyes at him. This was odd. He could grope her, and she would laugh, but he would give her a simple answer to a question and seem to anger her. "Amarra?"

"I did not ask you only for you to tell me what you think I need to hear."

Shippo stopped playing with Kirara and looked at the two adults in the room, wondering what was brewing. He guessed nothing as Miroku got up and left the hut. With a shrug, Shippo went back to his previous activities, not connecting the dots as Amarra mentioned she was going to for a walk and followed Miroku out.

"Everyone has their burdens." Miroku answered the moment Amarra stepped outside. She stayed behind him, noting as his cursed hand moved from his side. She knew he was looking at it now. "Some more so than others, but all of them burdens just the same."

"So, why bother others with your burdens?"

"Yes."

"I did not ask you to pour your heart out to me. I merely asked if you were in pain. I would not have asked if I did not want to know."

Miroku turned, looking at Amarra now. "So you always answer honestly when people ask you if you are well?"

"Never." Amarra smiled.

"Yet, you are upset because you feel that I am lying."

"I know you are lying, Miroku. And yes that upsets me. It may not be fair. It just is."

"Then why?"

"Why what?"

"Why does that upset you, even though you know it is not fair."

Amarra shrugged. She didn't think about such things. Living with Sesshomaru for these past couple of years had stopped certain 'pointless' questions from entering her mind. Why she felt something, was the primary one. "It just does."

Miroku stared at Amarra for a moment. "Yes" he finally stated.

"Yes, what?"

"Yes, I am in pain. But it is nothing that some time in the springs will not cure."

"I have a feeling if you go to the hot springs now Sango will make sure you are in even more pain."

Miroku smiled. "I do not mean with Sango. However, speaking of, if you conversed with Sango and were nicer to Inuyasha then you wouldn't have to be so concerned about my well being" he teased. "You would have others to speak with."

Amarra did not answer because she already knew that was not the case.

Her automatic reaction when Miroku was attacked, had been to protect him. To stay near him to make sure he was not attacked again.

She doubted speaking with Sango more, or being "nice" to the hanyou would change that instinct. Other people might have wondered why.

She had lived with Sesshomaru, and that experience stopped that question from forming in her mind.

She did not know why.

It just was.


	11. Promises

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

Sorry for the delay. I've been too busy to write. Also, there will be some more delay because I need to catch up on my other story now that I've brought this back up. I will be alternating between the two, so again sorry in advance. But I will do the best I can.

Notes to Readers:

Motoko—I know I'm a chapter late in thanking, so a belated thank you for reading.

Borrowlover—Thanks for the feedback. I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter.

TheBigW—Lots of feedback so here's a long response LOL. I know that Amarra isn't the first woman to not smack Miroku. The purpose was to explain Amarra in a way that further separated her as her own type of character from Sango for the readers and Miroku. Even though she's my original character, I don't want to tell her story all at once, especially to the detriment of others. So I explain a bit about her at a time through certain actions, including how she may differ in relating to certain characters. As for why Miroku and the others may have expected a smack—it sort of has to do with her and Sango's "type" and I'll clarify during this chapter (I was planning on waiting, but it can fit here too). Second, aside from it not being a Miroku&Sango story, my pairings aren't set in stone yet. But I have to get everyone to a certain point before the end decision is made. FOR EXAMPLE (yelling just to be clear. Again haven't made up my mind) It wouldn't example be good enough for me to just have Inuyasha choose Kikyo (FOR EXAMPLE just to be clear LOL) without exploring Inuyasha and Sango really well. Or else it's not a real triangle. However, since you asked, I will do a part about Miroku and Sango together discussing why they decided not to be with each other, but it will be more towards the end when I've made up my mind for sure who goes where, and when the other non-couples have their big moments accepting there not being together.

Bellflower—Well, as always, I did the best I could this past chapter. Anyway, I thought I was clear on why Kagome left, but I'll put it in an Inuyasha only chapter one chapter soon. I wanted to avoid Kagome as much as I could because I can't stand her 99.9 of the time, but I didn't want to completely trash her character. So I will have to put some work into it.

Icygirl—Thank you for your patience and feedback. And I promise to finish this story, so I hope you hang in there.

and Roxy—I'm glad you're enjoying my story and appreciate the feedback!

Here's the next chapter. Hope you enjoy.

A scent reached Inuyasha, and he left his new perch for his old one, near the hot springs. He got there just after Miroku immersed himself into the water.

"Hey!"

Miroku opened his eyes with a small sigh. "Yes, Inuyasha?"

"I need you to handle the bitch."

"She has a name, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha answered with a Feh. Amarra wouldn't call him by name; why should Inuyasha use hers.

"Besides, what makes you think I can handle her?"

"You get along well enough."

At the realization, Inuyasha found himself curious as to what that meant for Miroku and Sango…for a second. Then he figured that he had been right, Kagome had been wrong, and there was nothing to Miroku and Sango more than their friendship.

That thought caused Inuyasha to feel a sort of relief for his demon slayer friend. Because, though Inuyasha liked Miroku, Inuyasha didn't think that Miroku would ever be the settling down type of man. And Sango seemed like the settling down type of woman.

"That's because I'm the only one who has made an effort. I am sure there is nothing more to it than that."

Inuyasha jumped down from his tree branch. "She didn't slap you when you groped her" he noted.

"Why, Inuyasha, you act as if my advances are always rebuffed. I'll have you know that I am successful much more often than not." Miroku closed his eyes with a smirk.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "Whatever…but not with her type I'd bet."

"Her type being?"

"A fighter…like Sango."

"Sango and Amarra are the same type perhaps, but they are not alike." Miroku said, primarily to himself.

Inuyasha had a point, Miroku realized. At first glance, Sango and Amarra were the same "types". Generally speaking, they were the same type. They were both obviously strong women, warriors, hell, even their wardrobe was similar. And Inuyasha was right, generally those types of women, Miroku did not have much luck at.

Those types of women had a purpose…and they had more important things to do than be seduced by some lecherous man. And generally they would be offended at even being "asked".

Miroku, just like the rest of them, had in fact expected a slap from Amarra, just like he always expected a slap from Sango. The entire reason he had groped her was so that she would get angry and forget her anger at Inuyasha.

He was surprised to just get a laugh.

But, after their discussion earlier in the evening, he was reminded that Amarra's personality was unlike one he had encountered.

Amarra saw things…differently. Not just from Sango, but from most people. She had a calm, direct honesty about her that was just…different.

It likely had to do with her involvement with Sesshomaru. Miroku imagined that being involved with Sesshomaru, in more than a physical way, though neither Sesshomaru nor Amarra would probably ever admit it, took a specific type of woman. And even if Amarra started off one way, she would wind up molding herself another way just to survive in Sesshomaru's world.

So, while Miroku still did not know exactly why Amarra laughed off his grope, he was learning he could not base Amarra's words or actions on what Sango would do in a given situation.

"Feh. Just let her know that I won't be responsible…"

"Inuyasha, may I make a suggestion?"

"I don't care if she's just trying to test me like Sango thought…."

"And I'm going to make the same suggestion to Sango. Don't mention your brother. I have a feeling that is what makes her angry."

Inuyasha crossed his arms, waiting for Miroku to continue.

"We don't…know what type of relationship they had. I am sure there is more to it, just like I am sure I shouldn't bore you with my thoughts."

"Good, cause I don't care."

"Of course…I just think…it would be best if you and Sango not mention him the way you do. And I will continue to push her to give you a chance."

"I don't give a fuck if she gives me a chance…I just don't want to hear her mouth!"

"Of course, Inuyasha." People said that Miroku had an ego. Inuyasha's ego was such that he remembered every slight…and he was harsher than necessary to try and protect himself from such. Yet, Miroku knew that was not what to say, so, he did what Sango had been doing lately, and made a suggestion that had nothing to do with Inuyasha's feelings., but would hopefully have the desired effect. "However she may not know that. And I think that if she gives you more of a chance, she will automatically be kind, and therefore you will not be bothered by her."

"Fine." Inuyasha was convinced and the subject was dropped.

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Shippo came from Miroku's hut. "Amarra says he went to the hot springs. He'll be mad when he finds out he missed you."

"Not as angry as he used to be." Sango stated to herself. She wondered why Miroku still flirted with her, when it seemed obvious that things weren't the same anymore. When it seemed that there was a growing closeness between him and Amarra.

She hoped the monk didn't take things too far and get himself attacked by Sesshomaru. He was one of the best friends she ever had.

Best friends. When did that become settled in her mind? Probably with the growing closeness between her and Inuyasha.

She chose to let the thought flutter out of her mind and released her hair to brush it.

"Isn't Inuyasha coming?" Shippo asked Sango.

"No." Sango finished brushing her hair. "Inuyasha remembers that he was not wanted here not too long ago. So he wishes to sleep in the forest."

"His feelings are still hurt."

Sango smiled softly. "You can be very aware sometimes, Shippo."

Shippo's grin beamed across his face, but then it faded as he added softly. "I wish people would be more careful."

Sango pulled Shippo onto her lap. "Me as well. Which is why we need to be extra cautious about his feelings. To make up for the others."

Shippo nodded and then yawned.

"Ready for bed?"

Shippo yawned his answer again and climbed onto Sango's mat, using a still full sized Kirara as his pillow. "Sango?"

"Yes?" Sango joined him on the mat.

"I…thank you…" Shippo blushed slightly.

"For what, Shippo?"

"For…treating me like Kagome used to….in your own way. You make me miss her a bit less. You don't…think she'd mind do you?"

Sango looked at Shippo. "I think as long as we never forget her, than Kagome would be happy not to have us miss her too badly. Kagome would want us to be happy. Not to hold on to our thoughts of her at the detriment of our own joy."

Shippo let that thought run through him. Then Kagome would be happy. Miroku seemed okay, he found a friend in Amarra. Shippo was happier because of Sango, and he was growing used to Amarra and liked her a teeny bit as well. Sango and Inuyasha seemed friendlier now.

He hoped Kagome would be happy.

Shippo closed his eyes and Sango stopped looking at him and turned to face the wall.

Before she shut her own eyes, Inuyasha's enchanted beads caught her eye, sitting against her Hiraikotsu. She felt the need to hold onto them until they could get them safely back in Kaede's hands. Looking at them made her think of Kagome again…Inuyasha again.

But now, after speaking with Shippo, Sango realized, Kagome would truly want her friends to be happy. Never to forget her, but not to spend their lives missing her. With those admissions, Sango felt no more guilt in her growing attachment to Inuyasha.

When she closed her eyes, her mind was completely at peace in every way with her heart's growing desires. And Sango promised herself, one day,

She would tell him how she felt.

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Inuyasha had just begun to close his eyes for the night, when one of Kikyo's soul collectors flew above his head. Like always, he was off in a shot. Actually, surprisingly faster than normal, because he figured, since they just saw each other mere hours ago, there could very well be something wrong for her to be calling him again already.

Maybe this time it had something to do with…

"Naraku…" Inuyasha hissed under his breath at the thought.

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Through Kanna's mirror, Naraku watched as Inuyasha sprinted towards his "deceased" beloved.

The other girl, Kagome, was gone. But that didn't much matter to Naraku.

Naraku knew it was Inuyasha's drive to avenge Kikyo and what happened, or rather didn't happen, between them that made him such a fierce opponent. That drove his hatred.

Naraku also noted, that despite Kikyo's words to the contrary, the fact that Kagome was no longer there did in fact matter to Kikyo. Or else she wouldn't be calling for Inuyasha so soon.

And then…Kagura looked over as Naraku laughed in thought…there was Sango.

Naraku observed their growing closeness.

Inuyasha, Kikyo, and Sango made things so easy it was almost too much so.

Naraku didn't even have to interfere.

Kanna put her mirror down and walked away; as Naraku realized that Kikyo was all too aware of when someone was watching her.

But Naraku was betting that things would go the way he wished.

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Inuyasha skidded to a stop in front of Kikyo. "What's wrong!"

Kikyo smiled softly. "There is nothing wrong, Inuyasha. I just…" to Inuyasha's surprise, Kikyo stepped closer to him. "…wished to see you again." Inuyasha blinked slowly, stopping Kikyo's move forward. "Should I not have called?" her voice dropped. "I just…"

Thought that now Kagome was no longer there, that…

"…it would be okay to see you now" she began to back up, but Inuyasha stopped her with a breathless.

"Kikyo…" before pulling her into an embrace.

Kikyo returned Inuyasha's hug, burying her face against his chest, allowing the warmth of his body to invade hers. "I know I shouldn't…" she mumbled. "I just…wished to see you."

"Why shouldn't we?"

"Naraku." Kikyo's eyes watered.

Inuyasha growled. "Don't mention that bastard to me right now" he tightened his hold.

"But he is the driving force." Kikyo forced herself away. "He must be your focus; I should not distract you. Nothing should distract you. When you are distracted…" she repeated what she stated earlier. "…Naraku gains the upper hand." Kikyo moved away, cursing herself for her foolish heart.

Perhaps one day, she and Inuyasha would be together in some way.

However, Kikyo did not want her desire to see her beloved, to be with her beloved, to cause Naraku to gain the upper hand and end Inuyasha's life too soon.

Part of Inuyasha wanted to tell Kikyo to forget Naraku. But more of him didn't. Couldn't.

Kikyo, as usual, was right.

Inuyasha would destroy Naraku. For Kikyo, for Shippo, for Miroku

For Sango.

For himself.

Only then could Kikyo be able to and would Kikyo allow herself to rest in peace if she so desired.

Only then would Inuyasha really know if he should join her right then or continue in the land of the living and let nature decide when he should be with Kikyo again.

But whether they would be together or not, the thought of waiting until Naraku was destroyed to even see Kikyo again sent Inuyasha's heart into his stomach. "I need to see you whenever I can, Kikyo."

"We should not."

"I don't care."

"You need to care. I care. You need to care." Kikyo turned her back to Inuyasha.

But she didn't call her soul collectors to carry her away.

Inuyasha stepped forward. "You are my driving force, Kikyo."

"I do not wish to be."

Inuyasha watched the bow from Kikyo's hair blow in the night breeze. He needed something more, and answered the call for it by pulling the ribbon gently from her ebony strands. Once more he stepped forward, staring as Kikyo's hair blew calmly.

"I should not have called you, Inuyasha. I am sorry."

"I need to see you when I can, Kikyo." Inuyasha repeated, ignoring her thoughts. "Are you going to make me search you out?"

Kikyo whirled around. "You do not have the time!"

"I will make the time!" Inuyasha yelled back, bending so they were eye level.

"What about the others? They need for you to destroy Naraku too."

Inuyasha looked at the ground. "I know that."

"You have a life, Inuyasha. You have…people that care…and a purpose. That go beyond me."

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"Are you going to ask, or stare?"

Kagura gasped, caught off guard by Naraku's question. He turned around to face her. "What makes you so sure that Kikyo and Inuyasha will allow themselves to grow closer. Inuyasha…yes, I could see that. But Kikyo always rebuffs him."

Naraku sighed, annoyed. "That was before Kagome left. She's called for him twice in one day. Obviously she is allowing her heart to takeover. She is as foolish as he now."

Kagura did not ask another question. It just seemed to her that Naraku would be wrong. That Kikyo and Inuyasha wanted Naraku dead too much to allow any other desires, even of each other, to get in the way of that.

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"Nothing goes beyond you." Inuyasha whispered.

"You say that now because we are here alone."

Inuyasha looked at Kikyo once more.

She was wrong. Nothing ever surpassed his love for Kikyo. Even as Kagome came close, perhaps even matched it in some ways, nothing ever surpassed it.

Yet, Kikyo was right, because Inuyasha's desire to destroy Naraku needed to be quenched. And while it was easy to get caught up in the moment when Kikyo was near him, Inuyasha knew that desire to kill Naraku would eat at him until the day that was done.

Kikyo looked into Inuyasha's eyes and watched whatever thoughts he was having battle each other.

Kikyo looked into Inuyasha's eyes and realized it would kill her…literally kill her all over again…if she had to wait until Naraku was dead before allowing herself the chance to look into them again.

"Both of us get farther when we do not clutter our minds and hearts with each other."

Inuyasha's ears fell.

"But…" Kikyo reached out, touching Inuyasha's hair. "I need to see you when I can as well" she admitted. "So…the only thing I will promise…I will commit to…is that I will call for you…sometimes." Kikyo decided.

Light entered Inuyasha's eyes at her promise. He nodded in agreement.

"That means you will not waste time looking for me. You will stay focused on your travels, on your safety…"

On living your life…for some reason that thought fluttered through Kikyo's mind.

"All right."

Kikyo looked up and her soul collectors began to wrap around her.

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Naraku realized Kagura doubted him. But she was as idiotic as everyone else. Naraku knew Kikyo…he knew Inuyasha…he had been watching them both for years. He knew that without the distraction of Kagome, he just had to sit back, and watch as Kikyo and Inuyasha grew closer again…

And Naraku saw enough today to know that without the distraction of Kagome, Inuyasha and Sango would be doing the same.

Naraku could only imagine the betrayal Kikyo would feel as Inuyasha grew close to another…again, even while they were doing the same.

When the time came, he would use all of that against Inuyasha.

It was so easy…almost too much so.

Yet, Naraku planned to enjoy every moment.


	12. Travelling

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

As always sorry for the delay. I'm also sorry this chapter is so short, but I've been sitting on this part of the chapter for awhile now. I was going to add more, but finally decided to just I've decided to split the chapter into different ones so I could post something now.

Thanks for the feedback: TheBigW, Icygirl, and Ignorant Wisdom

From on top of Ah-Un, Rin held her hand above her mouth, yawning quietly. She opened her eyes again, hoping that since he was in front of her, Lord Sesshomaru didn't notice.

"Jaken, stay here with Rin while she rests and then catch up." Sesshomaru said, not even bothering to turn around, as he continued walking at his leisurely pace.

"But My Lord…" both Jaken and Rin started to protest, but as Sesshomaru still just kept strolling they realized that his decision had been made.

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She wondered where he was.

Amarra quietly sat up, leaning against the wall as she wrapped her arms around her legs.

She stared at Miroku as he slept soundly. Though the monk was in her sights, right now all she could do was think of Sesshomaru.

Rin.

Even Jaken.

Where were they? What were they doing?

Would she ever be able to be with them again?

Why was it that she always seemed to lose her homes?

First, she was taken away from her family and friends in her village. Then she allowed herself to make a new family of sorts with the companions she was forced into, only to be required to leave them as well.

"Sesshomaru" Amarra whispered as she allowed the tears to form in her eyes.

She would allow herself to cry.

But only tonight.

After tonight, she was never going to cry over Sesshomaru again she promised herself.

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Just before daybreak, Miroku awoke to find Amarra staring. It took him a moment to realize that she wasn't staring at anything particular.

He would never know that position was how she'd spent her entire evening.

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He knew it was early.

The sun was barely up.

But he didn't care.

The sooner this was all over, the sooner everyone's lives could continue.

Inuyasha ran through the village, ready to force his companions up by force if necessary. Dust flew around him as she stopped short, surprised to find them all waiting outside of Sango's hut. "We have been waiting forever" she chastised.

"Yes, come along now." Miroku chimed in as he began walking, Sango following.

"I'm still hungry." Shippo whined. "When's lunch?" he hopped on Amarra's shoulder.

"We just ate." Amarra chastised. "Lunch won't be for awhile now" she moved next.

The shock left Inuyasha's eyes and he darted in front of Miroku, assuming his position of leader.

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"Did you sleep well?"

Inuyasha glanced over to find Sango had caught up with him and was walking by his side.

"Feh" he stared straight ahead again.

He had spent the night thinking of Kikyo…Kagome…even Sango a bit to his surprise.

"I take it that means, no."

"It means I slept, I'm up, what difference does it make to ya."

"It was a simple question. There is no need to be rude." Briefly, Sango wished that she had some form of the enchanted beads Kagome used to reign Inuyasha in.

Briefly.

Sango realized she never would have used them even if such an item existed. Why should she try and change who Inuyasha was. His rudeness was just a part of him.

But it didn't mean that she didn't find him annoying when he was such. He was aggravating. Sango allowed her stroll to slow so Inuyasha was ahead of her again.

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"The hanyou has upset Sango." Amarra noted.

"Inuyasha" Miroku and Shippo reminded her at the same time. "She doesn't look upset." Miroku added in disagreement.

"She's upset."

"Trust me, I have seen Sango upset. She is not upset."

"Just because the hanyou…"

"Inuyasha…"

"…isn't holding his face to cover her red hand print does not mean she is not upset. She is upset in a different way than you make her."

"And what way is that?" Shippo wondered.

Amarra did not answer. Shippo was too young to understand such things. And by the way Miroku looked at her, his violet eyes questioning her statement as well, he had not yet really noticed. Actually she couldn't imagine Miroku not noticing what was happening right in front of him between Sango and Inuyasha. But perhaps he didn't understand the extent that it ran.

Perhaps it was because she was a woman and therefore knew the signs….perhaps it was because she had herself experienced falling for someone she had no plans to fall for…

Sango had strong feelings for, and Amarra dared to think, Sango was probably in love with the hanyou.

Inuyasha, she corrected herself automatically. At that she glanced a look at Miroku again. He was still waiting for an answer. Still looking at her with those beautiful violet eyes…

Amarra cleared her throat and looked straight ahead once more, fighting to stop the blood from rushing to her cheeks. She moved faster and soon Miroku found himself taking up the rear,

and wondering why.

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As Amarra passed her, Shippo hopped on Sango's shoulder, the question still wondering through his mind. "Did Inuyasha make you upset?"

"What? Oh…no, not really. He was just being himself" she added a bit louder so she would be sure that Inuyasha heard her.

He didn't even bother to answer her with his normal Feh and Sango felt her annoyance at him growing.

"Good." Inuyasha had driven one of his mommy's away, Shippo would hate to lose the other one because of him too.

Sango slowed down to allow the chance for Miroku to catch up to them. And when he did, he repeated Shippo's question.

"Did Inuyasha upset you?"

"No" she sighed, exasperated.

"If you say so." Miroku wasn't as inclined to believe Sango as Shippo was.

"I do."

"Fine."

"Fine." Sango sped up and once again, Miroku found himself taking up the rear, and wondering why.

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Inuyasha stopped walking. He took a sniff and then suddenly he was off in a shot.

The others realized he must have sensed a demon. Kirara grew to full size, carrying the rest of the group.

Just as suddenly, their movement stopped and they were side by side with Inuyasha again.

"Do you sense it?" Sango looked at Miroku.

"I do, and it's moving rather…"

Before Miroku could finish his thought, the demon stood right in front of them. Amarra prepared herself, but Miroku touched her hand, shaking his head 'no'.

"Where…is…she?" Koga growled.

Inuyasha smirked. "She's gone. And without her here to protect you" he unsheathed his Tetseigua. "Those shards are mine."

"Actually." Koga countered as he crouched in preparation for battle. "Without her here to protect you, you are dead."

Amarra smiled, glad that Miroku was wrong and there was going to be a battle.

"Inuyasha! No!" Sango, Miroku, and Shippo yelled. Even Kirara let out a roar.

"Kagome would not want you two fighting!" Sango added.

Kagome? Amarra heard that name again. Once more, this all boiled down to this Kagome?

The mention of her name seemed to stop the two demons for a second.

They both knew Sango was right.

"And we all have more important things to do than waste our time battling each other when we have a common enemy." Miroku added.

"He is NOT coming with us!"

"I don't think my nose could handle traveling with you dog breath!"

Inuyasha cut his eyes and growled; Koga immediately following.

"He doesn't have to come." Sango finally hopped down from Kirara, standing between the both of them. "However, when we finally catch up with Naraku and Kagura…"

"I will handle Naraku!" Inuyasha allowed his gaze to drift to Sango.

"And I will destroy the bitch and avenge my comrades!" Koga stood straight once more.

"Then why would you two want to waste your energy fighting each other." Sango finished.

"Kagome does not want you two fighting." Miroku repeated. "Inuyasha, let Koga pass."

Inuyasha growled again, but sheathed his Tetseigua. "Pass mangy wolf."

"It's not as if I need permission."

Sango looked at Inuyasha and shook her head before he could respond. Despite himself, he granted her silent request and did not answer Koga.

"Where is my woman?"

"Kagome ain't your…"

"Kagome went home Koga." Miroku answered.

"When is she coming back?"

"She's not."

The news hit Koga like a slap in the face. His eyes grew in disbelief. "What do you mean she is not coming back."

"Kagome decided to continue her life back in her present time. She no longer wishes to join us on our journey."

Koga turned his attention back to Inuyasha. "What…did…you…do!"

"I'll tell you what I'm going to do if you don't move along!"

"Koga!" Sango snapped. "Inuyasha did not do anything. Kagome left because she needed to. There is nothing else to add."

"He must have…"

"MOVE ALONG!" Sango yelled so loudly even Inuyasha was taken aback.

Koga blinked, surprised this wench would dare to yell at him. He was a prince damn it.

"No matter. I will just go and get her one day." Koga decided. And with that he turned and disappeared in a flash.

"I thought no one could get her" Amarra was now not only disappointed there would be no fight, but confused as to why, if Koga could get Kagome, no one else could.

Miroku looked at Amarra. "He cannot. He just wanted to get in one last as she would say dig at Inuyasha before leaving. Given that Sango got the best of him."

"She is protective." Amarra nodded.

Sango felt her cheeks getting warm and turned away from Inuyasha. She began walking and wondering if it was becoming obvious…was it becoming obvious that she had feelings for Inuyasha? Should she reign herself in a bit before even Inuyasha noticed.

She had decided last night that she would tell him one day. However, she knew that today should not be that day.

"She's just bossy." Inuyasha disagreed, following Sango. "And he's lucky she was here, or else those shards would be mine."


	13. Complex

Disclaimer—only own the characters I create. Not Inuyasha or any of the others upon which this story is based.

As always sorry for the delay. I'm also sorry this chapter is so short, but this is the second part of the last chapter (which I decided to split up into two halves).

Thanks for the feedback: Icygirl2, Anime-Lover09 (If Kagome comes back it will be towards the end, and if so then I will explain what has been happening to her), TheBigW.

Sesshomaru stopped walking, and waited. Patiently or impatiently, one could not be sure by looking at him. Suddenly a streak flew across the sky, hovering above him for a moment. Finally Kagura landed.

"You don't seem surprised to see me" she noted, her fan covering the lower half of her face.

"If you have something to say, you should say it now before I am completely bored with you."

"Hm." Kagura arched her brow, lowering her fan. "Naraku sent me."

"Of course he did. You do nothing on your own"

Kagura's jaw twitched for a moment, but she refused to allow Sesshomaru to bait her with his words. "Let's just go"

"I am not going anywhere with you" Sesshomaru turned and began walking down the path he was before interrupted.

"But…do you not wish to get the best of Inuyasha? He robbed you of your birth right. Naraku wishes to help."

Sesshomaru stopped, but did not turn to look at Kagura. "What I plan to do with Inuyasha is between myself and Inuyasha; your master has nothing to do with it."

"Naraku is not my master!" Kagura finally snapped.

Sesshomaru actually smirked briefly. But he said nothing as he walked away.

"Naraku does not own me!" Kagura yelled after his retreating back, her anger growing since she realized both of them knew that Sesshomaru was correct.

She was the wind. She needed to be free.

Yet she was nothing but a puppet to Naraku.

And as of late, he was doing nothing but sending her off with messages…she did not know what he was up to.

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Just as he thought. Naraku smiled as Kanna's mirror finally darkened on the conversation between Kagura and Sesshomaru. He did not know what brought him more joy, knowing how tortured Kagura was, or knowing that Sesshomaru wouldn't be around to interfere the next time Naraku chose to show himself to Inuyasha

Sesshomaru was avoiding Inuyasha right now. Which meant he would be nowhere to be found when Naraku's latest plan went into effect, which suited Naraku perfectly. He would use Sesshomaru if needed, but the dog demons brotherly relationship was a lot more complex than either of them would lead others to believe. Then Naraku originally believed himself. But the more he watched them around each other, the more he saw there was more than simple hatred.

Sesshomaru had a certain logic…certain feelings about Inuyasha that Naraku had yet to fully grasp and he did not want Sesshomaru in the way right now.

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_Flashback_

_Inuyasha had just turned 3 in human years when he realized it was because he was a hanyou that people hated him. He did not know what a hanyou was however, and the one time he brought it up to his mother she burst into tears and just hugged him tightly. _

"_Sesshomaru?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Can I ask you sumthin?"_

_Inuyasha hated making his mother cry, so he decided to ask the other, Sesshomaru, the next time he saw him. Sesshomaru seemed very wise to Inuyasha, so Sesshomaru probably would know._

"_May I ask you something." Sesshomaru corrected Inuyasha annoyed. He spoke like a commoner. He was half royalty._

"_I wanna go first, please."_

_Sesshomaru sighed and just let it go. "What Inuyasha?"_

"_What is a hanyou?"_

"_You are a hanyou. Now, we are going to try something new._

"_But…." Inuyasha knew that much, but he did not know what it meant._

_Sesshomaru continued as if Inuyasha did not interrupt. "I want you to strike me."_

_Inuyasha's eyes grew. He did not want to hit Sesshomaru! He was happy around Sesshomaru. He liked Sesshomaru. He had to stop himself from crying whenever Sesshomaru left. And he did not even bother containing his joy when Sesshomaru was around, though he only showed it with a huge grin. _

_He hoped Sesshomaru would be around always. _

_When Inuyasha asked his mother what it meant to be happy around someone, what it meant to like someone, what it meant to want to cry when they left, or smile when they were around, his mother told him that meant one loved the other._

_So Inuyasha figured he loved Sesshomaru._

_Though he never dared to say so._

_But he surely would not strike him either._

"_No" he answered firmly._

_Sesshomaru cut his eyes as Inuyasha dared to actually tell him 'no'. No one told him 'no' since their father and his mother died. Sesshomaru reached up in a way Inuyasha recognized from all the beatings he took, and Inuyasha instantly shut his eyes, wincing in wait. _

_Sesshomaru stared as Inuyasha prepared himself to be struck, and something made him lower his hand._

_He told himself that it was because Inuyasha was still only a child._

_Even as he knew there was more to it than he might want to admit._

"_Strike me, Inuyasha."_

_Inuyasha slowly opened his eyes. "I don't wanna."_

"_Do you wish to know what a hanyou is?"_

_Inuyasha nodded quickly, glad that Sesshomaru finally stopped wanting to fight._

"_Then strike me."_

"_No." Inuyasha shook his head, his ears dropping. _

"_Then we are done here." Sesshomaru turned around and began to walk._

_Something about the way Sesshomaru said that, made it clear that this time, he would not return, and Inuyasha's heart fell into the pit of his stomach. "No!"_

"_What have I told you about yelling at me, Inuyasha?" Sesshomaru stopped walking and Inuyasha ran, wrapping himself around Sesshomaru's leg. _

"_Don't go!" he cried._

"_Then do as I say." Sesshomaru bent down and picked Inuyasha up by the collar. He dropped him on the ground and Inuyasha landed with a slight thud. "Strike me."_

"_But…"_

"_Now. Or my time here is done."_

_Inuyasha stood and lightly threw his hand against Sesshomaru's leg. He looked up into Sesshomaru's eyes and hoped that he was satisfied. He could tell by his silence he was not, so with a swallow, Inuyasha closed his eyes, lifted his hand and swiped once more._

_Sesshomaru looked down and noticed a small tear in his pants leg. At least Inuyasha's claws ripped through his pants this time._

"_A hanyou is someone who does not belong anywhere."_

"_I belong!"_

"_That is why the villagers hate you, you do not belong."_

_Why was Sesshomaru trying to hurt him? Why would he say he didn't belong? "I do belong!" Inuyasha swung again, this time drawing a bit of blood with his tiny claws. He gasped, backing up. "I'm sorry…I'm sorry…" he bowed on the ground._

"_Do you not feel better Inuyasha?"_

_Inuyasha looked up, surprised to see that Sesshomaru was kneeling so that their eyes would lock. This was a serious lesson, and Sesshomaru wanted to be sure Inuyasha understood._

"_When someone hurts you, you have a duty to hurt them back. Do you understand me? You do not let someone hurt you without protecting yourself."_

"_Why do you want to hurt me?" Inuyasha asked, his voice quivering, "Do you hate me too? Because I do not belong?"_

_Sesshomaru was actually taken aback by his questions, and grew silent._

_One word, one truthful word, and it was obvious that Sesshomaru could emotionally crush this little pup._

_All he had to admit was that he hated him._

_But he wasn't done training him yet. He did not know what demon powers the pup would have yet. _

_  
So now was not the time._

_This is what Sesshomaru told himself… as he finally answered._

"_I do not hate you, Inuyasha."_

_But a part of him thought he had been more truthful to the pup than he had to himself._

_Inuyasha sniffed. "Why do I not belong?"_

"_Your mother is human and your father is not."_

"_Father?" Inuyasha never thought of his father. He knew he had to have one, but his mother told him never to speak of it, so Inuyasha decided to just not think of it. "What is he?"_

"_A demon."_

_Inuyasha gasped. Demons were scary and evil! Everyone said so! Why would his father be an evil scary demon! _

_He was part evil scary demon!_

_No wonder everyone hated him…Inuyasha started to cry loudly now._

"_Stop that."_

_Inuyasha's cries grew louder._

"_Inuyasha…Inuyasha…" Sesshomaru's voice raised in annoyance, but as he watched his little brother's sobs shook his tiny body…"Inuyasha" he said softly this time as he touched his hair. Inuyasha hiccupped and with tears still streaming down his cheeks, looked at Sesshomaru. "I am a demon."_

"_No you ain't!" Inuyasha sobbed, wondering why Sesshomaru would lie about something like this._

"_Look at me Inuyasha. Do I look like a human to you?"_

"_Me….I mean…I look like you." Inuyasha corrected himself._

"_The demon part of you looks like me. I am a demon. Do you see reason to cry about your father being a demon now?""_

_Inuyasha stared at Sesshomaru for a long time. He did look different from anyone else, except him. But…Sesshomaru was not evil to Inuyasha. Sure, he was scary sometimes but…_

_Inuyasha blinked, remembering the first time they met. _

_  
Sesshomaru had killed those humans who were chasing him._

_Was Sesshomaru evil?_

"_No." Inuyasha whispered._

_Maybe to others Sesshomaru would be a scary, evil demon._

_But Inuyasha loved him._

_And that was all that mattered to him._

"_I will not cry anymore."_

_Inuyasha looked up, watching as Sesshomaru stood from the ground. He watched as the demon disappeared down the road. _

_Sesshomaru chastised himself for being so soft on Inuyasha._

_All he had to do was admit he hated him to have shattered the boy's spirit, but not only did Sesshomaru say he did not hate Inuyasha, Sesshomaru even felt…something…when the boy sobbed that made him want him to not be so broken._

_Sure, he could, and was telling himself, that it was because there was no honor in breaking a mere pup, but Sesshomaru realized there was more,_

_  
Damn the child._

_Sesshomaru was so ashamed of himself._

_The people he passed on the way back to his castle paid the price for that shame with their lives._


End file.
